Here's Why Adopting A Pet Is The Best Idea Ever

“I’m just a dog standing in front of a camera asking you to love me. What do you say?” World For All, a stray animal welfare organisation in Mumbai, just released some doggy dating videos (feat. cat) which show why adopting a pet is a great idea. World For All They make excellent subjects for all your ridiculous photo projects. World For All They provide hours and hours of endless entertainment for you. World For All And sometimes they're just...

Read More

A woman arrived at a party

A woman arrived at a party & while scanning the guests she spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him smiled and said, "Hello. My name is Carmen." "That's a beautiful name," he replied. "Is it a family name?" "No," she replied. "As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the things that I enjoy the most - cars and men. Therefore I chose Carmen." "What's your name?" she asked. He answered "B.J. Titsengolf."...

Read More

A lady had just stepped under the shower when she heardher doorbell ring...

Figuring whoever it was could wait, she chose to ignore the bells. After 30 seconds, the bell was again pressed followed by a man inquiring "Is anybody home? Its the blind man from town." Annoyed, the lady quickly dried off and without bothering to clothe herself raced down the stairs. As she opened the door with nothing on but the radio, she was greeted by a shocked by smiling man. "Nice tits.... where do you want the blinds?"...

Read More

Give a man a jacket

He'll be warm for the winter. Teach a man to jacket he won't leave the house....

Read More

3 clueless men

Three very conservative men were sitting in a bar discussing their daughters. The first man said: "I am so disappointed in my little girl. I was going through her room the other day, and found a bottle of Vodka. I did not know she drank" The second man continued: "I know how you feel. I was going through my princess' room and found a pack of cigarettes. I had no idea that she smoked." The third man looked at his friends longingly: "you two are very lucky. I found a condom in my daughter's room. I had no idea that she had a penis."...

Read More

A little boy is trying to peel the lid off his tub of yoghurt..

He gets frustrated and yells "fuckin' lid!". His mother turns to his father and says "where do you think he got that from?" The father says "the fuckin' fridge you dumb cunt"....

Read More

The Perfect Husband

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands-free speaker- function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN: "Hello" WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" MAN: "Yes." WOMAN: "I'm at the mall now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?" MAN: "Sure, go ahead if you like it that much." MAN: "How much?" WOMAN: "$65,000." MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the options." WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more...

Read More

Where's your bin?

A man sees that his neigjhbnour doesn't have his wheeled trash bin. "Hey bub, where's ya bin`" "I took a little vacation for a few weeks," "No. I meant where's your bin?" "Told ya, vacation, at the beach!" "No man. Where's ya wheely bin?" "Ok, fine! I've wheely been to jail! Happy now?"...

Read More

Fishermen Rescue Struggling Wombat After Finding Him Swimming In A Lake

“He just sat patiently and waited for us to take him back to the shore.” Craig Wilson / The Advocate / Via theadvocate.com.au Craig Wilson and his stepfather Bob Wilton were fishing for trout on Woods Lake in central Tasmania when they spotted the wombat who appeared to be drowning. The pair quickly came to the adorable animal's rescue and scooped him up in a net. Craig Wilson / The Advocate / Via theadvocate.com.au "It was a pretty rough and windy...

Read More

I can totally relate to batteries

I'm not included in anything either....

Read More

What do zero and nil have in common?

Absolutely Nothing...

Read More

What's the difference between Chris Brown and a Tesla?

The Tesla gets fewer battery charges in a year....

Read More

I was kicked out of the army because I got gonorrhea

It was a dishonorable discharge...

Read More

Which Red Hot Chili Peppers Member Are You?

“Several of my best friends wear, the colors of the crown…...

Read More

Which Halsey Song Are You?

Are you a wanderess or a one night stand...

Read More

Can You Identify The 5 Seconds Of Summer Music Video From The Screencap?

This is heartache on the big screen...

Read More

We Know Which Christmas Song You Should Listen To

It’s joyful and triumphant. CORRECTION: 2 of Santa's reindeer are Donner and Blitzen, not Dunder and Blixem...

Read More

Drake Dancing To "Hotline Bling" With His Mom Will Melt Your Heart

They know when that hotline bling, that can only mean one thing. Last Wednesday, the Toronto Raptors held their annual Drake Night in honor of the rapper, who happens to be the team's Brand Ambassador. Instagram: @http://ift.tt/1XBb5m2 Drizzy brought along a special date for the night's festivities: his mom, Sandi Graham. Instagram: @http://ift.tt/1Ii62VX Because there's nothing like date night with your mama. Instagram: @http://ift.tt/1XBb5m6 It's important to note that Drake loves his mom very much. instagram.com View Entire List ...

Read More

13 Questions BSB And NKOTB Fans Are Tired Of Hearing

Just, shhhhh. "New Kids on the Block and the Backstreet Boys are still around?" D U H. JIVE "You mean Backseat/Backdoor Boys?" You're simply jealous that you'll never be Mr. Nickolas Gene Carter. JIVE "Aren’t you too old to like boy bands?" How can one be too old to like boy bands? Should old people not like rap, because I’m pretty sure Snoop Dogg is close to 40. I mean, really. instagram.com "Oh my God, I used to love them when I was little and...

Read More

Avril Lavigne And Nick Carter Released A Single And It's A Pop Dream

Two of your nostalgic faves are makin’ some tunes. Hi. If you were a '90s kid or have listened to pop music at least once in your life, you know the Backstreet Boys, and you know Nick Carter. JIVE And if you were a rebellious skater kid in the '00s, you definitely know about the badassness that is Avril Lavigne. Arista Records View Entire List ...

Read More

15 People Who Are Definitely Not On The Drake Train

“Hotlines don’t bling, they blink.” Via Whisper. Someone who thinks Drake could get the early-bird special at Denny's. View Video › whisper.sh This person who is hung up on the details: View Video › whisper.sh Someone who can't live with their own feelings. View Video › whisper.sh Someone who wouldn't be swiping right if Drake was on Tinder. View Video › whisper.sh View Entire List ...

Read More

We Know Which Katy Perry Song Matches Your Zodiac Sign

Baby, you’re a firework...

Read More

An American spy goes to Soviet Russia.

An American spy is in Soviet Russia. He is digging up information on a powerful Russian politician, and is pretending to be a Russian. He finds the politician in a bar, and walks in, dressed in Russian attire. Everybody in the bar looks at him, but he keeps his cool. He orders a drink, and walks to the politician. "Greetings, comrade", says the spy, but before he could finish his sentence, the Russian says, "I think you are American spy". The spy is alarmed, but being a skilled, trained spy, he says, "that is not true, I am the proudest Soviet...

Read More

The Lost History Of A Deadly Boxing Match On The USS Yankee

The Lost History Of A Deadly Boxing Match On The USS Yankee In 1905, at the dawn of America’s empire under Teddy Roosevelt, a black sailor and a Jewish sailor boxed in a makeshift ring on the deck of a U.S. Navy ship. What was intended to be entertainment for hundreds of idle soldiers instead turned into a tragedy, marking a pivotal, if overlooked, moment in the history of race in the American military. November 30, 2015 at 01:03AM via Digg ht...

Read More

What does someone with a foot fetish wish for?

To meet their solemate....

Read More

Why don't blind people skydive?

It scares the fuck out of the dog....

Read More

Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose

No text fou...

Read More

When my first wife lost her credit card, I didn't report it.

Because whoever found it was spending less than she was....

Read More

My brother just threw a carton of milk at me

wtf , how dairy...

Read More

A man takes his seat at the World Cup Final. He looks to his left and notices that there is a spare seat between himself and the next guy.

The man: “Who would ever miss the World Cup final?” The guy: “That was my wife’s seat. We have been to the last five World Cup finals together, but sadly she passed away.” The man: “That’s terrible, but couldn’t you get another member of the family, friend, or someone else to come with you?” The guy: “No…they are all at the funeral!”...

Read More

How Evil Is Your Cat?

Is your cat just a bit cheeky? Or do they actually want to kill you...

Read More

This Tiny Canadian House Has A Tiny Adorable Corgi Elevator And We Can't Handle It

The elevator was built for a corgi, so now your world is complete. CBC News Howling Dog Construction View Entire List ...

Read More

Can You Guess If These Facts Are About Cats Or Dogs?

This will give you serious paws for thought. Merriam-Webster Dictionary, NY Daily News, Scientific American, Discovery News, Technophilic Hubris and Espionage Styles during the Cold War by Kristie Macrakis, How cats purr" by Dawn E. Frazer Sissom, D. A. Rice, and G. Peters, Lincoln at Home: Two Glimpses of Abraham Lincoln's Family Life by David Herbert Donald, Feline fortunes: Contrasting views of cats in popular culture by EA Lawrence, Responses of elbow extensors to landing forces during jump downs in cats by P. A. McKinley, J. L. Smith, R....

Read More

We Can Tell If You're A Cat Or Dog Person Based Off Your Taste In Avengers

We all have our tells...

Read More

The Oldest Known Seabird, An Albatross Named Wisdom, Has Returned To Her Island

Wisdom checks her egg in 2014. Greg Joder via U.S. Fish & Wildlife The world's oldest known seabird, a 64-year-old Laysan albatross named Wisdom, has returned to the remote Midway Atoll in the North Pacific, a milestone federal wildlife officials heralded in a Thanksgiving Day announcement. "It is very humbling to think that she has been visiting Midway for at least 64 years," Bret Wolfe, a manager at the Midway Atoll National Wildlife Refuge,...

Read More

The Toronto Zoo's Baby Pandas Actually Look Like Pandas Now

Has anyone ever noticed how weird panda butts are? In October, the Toronto Zoo celebrated the birth of twin Giant Panda cubs. Which is great! But let's be honest, newborn pandas are a bit... weird looking. Toronto Zoo They were still cute, of course! Like little naked mole rats. Toronto Zoo But now, the little darlings have outgrown their incubator and have moved into the fluffy, roly-poly stage of their lives. Toronto Zoo Look at those precious...

Read More

Two Canadian Guys Rescued A Bald Eagle And Then Took An Epic Selfie

“Everybody thinks it’s like the selfie of the year.” Michael Fletcher of Sudbury, Ontario was hunting grouse with his brother Neil when they spotted what appeared to be an eagle off in the woods. They moved in for a closer look and saw that it was a bald eagle. One of the bird's talons was caught in a trap. "The bird was pretty calm," he told BuzzFeed Canada. "It was probably tired from trying to fight the trap." facebook.com Fletcher took off his...

Read More

"Do you have a vagina?"

A woman is at home when she hears someone knock at the door.She goes to the door and opens the door to see a man standing there He asks the lady, 'Do you have a vagina?' She slams the door in disgust. The next morning she hears a knock at the door and it is the same man and he asks the same question of the woman, 'Do you have a vagina?' She slams the door again. Later that night when her husband gets home she tells him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells the wife in a loving and concerned voice, 'Honey, I am taking tomorrow...

Read More

Johnny was in class one day...

and the teacher was asking everyone what their parents do. One said her dad was a firefighter, another said his mom was a nurse. When the teach asked Johnny what his dad does Johnny said "Well my dad is a stripper in a gay bar, and if the guy looks good and the money is right he'll have sex with him out back in the alley." The teacher asked everyone to take their seats and sit quietly, then asked Johnny to step into the hall. She asked Johnny if his dad was really a stripper in a gay bar and Johnny said "Absolutely not. He's the quarterback for...

Read More

How come Peter Pan is always flying?

Because he Neverlands....

Read More

A man on his death bed requested his wife, 3 sons,

his nurse and a camera to be set up to record his final moments. Which were as follows... "To my son David, I leave the 2 blocks of flats in the East end of London," "To my other son Michael , I leave the 4 penthouse's in Chelsea," "and finally to my eldest son Kevin, I leave the big glass building near tower bridge". With that he slipped away. The nurse turned to the wife and said "I never realised your husband was so wealthy, you and your sons are very lucky" His wife swiftly replied "Was he Hell ! He was a "bloody window cleaner!"...

Read More

I don't understand why women love singing "Let it go"...

...Since most of them keep grudges for life....

Read More

I started carrying a gun after an attempted mugging a few years ago

Since then my muggings have been much more successful....

Read More

My dad posted a picture of his "Condom challenge fail"

It was a picture of me...

Read More

Two men were sitting next to each other at Murphy’s Pub in London.

After awhile, one bloke looks at the other and says, ‘I can’t help but think, from listening to you, that you’re from Ireland’ The other bloke responds proudly, ‘Yes, that I am!’ The first one says, ‘So am I! And where about from Ireland might you be?’ The other bloke answers, ‘I’m from Dublin, I am.’ The first one responds, ‘So am I!’ ‘Mother Mary and begora. And what street did you live on in Dublin ?’ The other bloke says, ‘A lovely little area it was. I lived on McCleary Street in the old central part of town.’ The first one says, ‘Faith and...

Read More

Why don't pirates drive on mountain roads?

'Scurvy...

Read More

A gay deer walks into a bar

After a long night he comes stumbling out and says, "I can't believe I just blew 50 bucks in there"...

Read More

All last night I dreamed I was a muffler...

I woke up exhausted...

Read More

A bus stops in New York and 2 Italian men get on.

They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following(italian accent): 'Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more! Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time.' The lady can't take this any more, 'You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig!' she retorted indignantly. 'In this country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives!' 'Hey,...

Read More

You got to hand it to blind prostitutes...

No text fou...

Read More

Just saw a couple of dudes trying to grab an old lady's purse so I ran over to help.

We got it off her eventually...

Read More

My son, the mass murderer: ‘What did I miss?’

My son, the mass murderer: ‘What did I miss?’ In 2006, Charlie Roberts walked into an Amish school in Pennsylvania and killed five young girls. His mother talks about trying to comprehend his actions. November 29, 2015 at 02:57AM via Digg http://ift.tt/1Nh9v...

Read More

$100 Bill

A: Why are you late? B: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill. A: That's nice. Were you helping him look for it? B: No, I was standing on it....

Read More

You’ve Definitely A Cute Break With BuzzFeed's Animals Newsletter

The weekday struggle is real — but our Animals newsletter will help. Have you ever felt like this little guy during your workday? imgur.com / Via reddit.com Does getting through round after round of meetings, calls and reports make you feel like this cat? imgur.com Then it’s going to take some serious cute to perk you up — and BuzzFeed’s Animals newsletter is the easiest way to get it! imgur.com / Via reddit.com When you sign up for the newsletter,...

Read More

How do you kill a guy with a coconut allergy?

You put a bounty on his head....

Read More

Why did the ghost cross the road?

To come back from the other side....

Read More

So the other day, my friend told me that I have no idea what irony meant...

Which was pretty ironic, considering we were at a bus stop....

Read More

What do Taylor Swift and Charlie Sheen have in common?

Bad blood....

Read More

Adam Lambert Plays A Hilarious Game Of "Would You Rather"

He’s had a pretty iconic career in the last six years since catapulting to fame on American Idol. And there's no sign of Adam Lambert slowing down any time soon. Having just released another single,“Another Lonely Night”, BuzzFeed invited him into our London office to play a hilariously fun game of "Would You Rather". And things got risqué quite quickly. Here's what went down... Would you rather be a dog or a cat? Adam: Oh come on. Easy! Dog. BF:...

Read More

We Need To Talk About The Magical Fierceness Of Fleur East

Move over, everyone else. This is Fleur East. She's a London-born artist who competed on the second series of "The X Factor" in 2005. instagram.com Fleur performed as a member of the girl group Addictiv Ladies, and formed a solo career in 2012. She returned to "The X Factor" as a solo artist in 2014 as well. instagram.com This is her slaying Bruno Mars' "Uptown Funk" back in 2014. Funkin' amazing. youtube.com Now, Fleur's returned to the spotlight and is serving up more fierceness than ever before. Instagram: @http://ift.tt/1YyiGnG View Entire...

Read More

Photographers are so violent.

They'll frame you, shoot you, blow you up and then hang you....

Read More

Confucius say: Nazi soldier who popular with ladies may be Hungaryan.

No text fou...

Read More

A guy was walking to a bar...

...and on his way he found a girl tied up to the railroad tracks. He untied her and they had sex. Guy gets to the bar, friends ask why he's so late, tells them about the girl he found and all the different positions they fucked in. Friends give him props and ask if he got head, guy replies "I couldn't find it."...

Read More

Where do you find a dog that has no legs?

Where you left it....

Read More

Theory vs reality

A boy comes home with the assignment of learning theory vs reality. So he asks his dad for help. "Ok son, ask your sister if she'd sleep with Justin Bieber for a million bucks." Kid comes back and says "Yeah dad she would." "Ok now ask your mom if she'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million bucks." Kid ask his mom. "Mom said she sure would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million bucks." Dad says "Now in THEORY we have two million dollars, in REALITY..... we live with a couple of whores."...

Read More

Why does it suck to work for the NSA during the winter?

Because if it snows, you can't call and say you're snowed in....

Read More

I saved 15% on car insurance by switching....

The gear to reverse and pulling away from the accident...

Read More

Why can't mexicans play uno?

They steal all the green cards....

Read More

Is Google male or female?

Female, because it doesn't let you finish a sentence before making a suggestion....

Read More

My dad told me I should fuck both of you.

Dad and Son in the living room when dad feet's get cold. "Get my slippers from upstairs". While upstairs he sees two of his sisters friends so he goes up to both of them, "My Dad told me to come up here and fuck both of you". "you're lying", OK I will prove it "Dad, did you say both of them?" "what's the point of fucking one"....

Read More

Smoking high-strength cannabis may damage nerve fibres in brain

Smoking high-strength cannabis may damage nerve fibres in brain Study suggests high levels of skunk use may affect the brain’s white matter, making communication between the right and left hemispheres less efficient. November 27, 2015 at 11:39PM via Digg http://ift.tt/1lN5p...

Read More

I cried when my dad chopped up onions

onions was a good dog :c...

Read More

Some acids walked into the enemy base...

Threat Neutralized....

Read More

Drake Responded To Adele And Apparently Their Love Is Mutual

♫ Hello from the 6 side. ♫ Last week when Adele was doing press in Canada, she told etalk that she wanted to do an official remix of "Hotline Bling." Kevin Winter / Getty Images And that she loves Drake as much as the rest of us. Ben Stansall / Getty Images Welp, Drake heard about Adele's comments. And when he was at the Toronto Raptors' Drake Night on Wednesday, the rapper responded: Kevin Winter / Getty Images "I’d literally go to Adele’s house...

Read More