Funny Story

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Thứ Năm, 1 tháng 10, 2015

a stepfather walks in on his stepdaughter

a stepfather walks into his stepdaughter's room, as he walks in he sees his stepdaughter pleasuring herself with a cucumber, in disgust he leaves her room as fast as possible

he then says,"dammit I was gonna eat that!.................. now it will taste like cucumber"

A banker, a worker and an immigrant

An immigrant, a worker and a banker are sitting at the table with 10 cookies. The banker takes 9 and then tells the worker "watch out, the immigrant is going to steal your cookie".

Critics say Botox is too expensive...

...but I spoke to fifty people who just paid for the treatment, and none of them looked surprised.

A lost rhinoceros wanders into a house and cannot find his way back out.

He panics and runs through a wall, destroying the kitchen. He's still inside the house so he breaks through another

wall, finding himself in the bathroom. He's frustrated that he still hasn't gotten out of the house and he tears through

a third wall. Still, he has not found his way out of the house. The rhinoceros then starts running towards another wall

but then stops, faces you, and says "you thought I'd break the fourth wall, didn't you?"

A tumor stole every memory I had. This is what happened when it all came back


A tumor stole every memory I had. This is what happened when it all came back
A tumor gave him amnesia and dementia. Surgery unlocked old memories and a new life.

September 30, 2015 at 06:42PM
via Digg http://ift.tt/1RfHM6Q

Yo momma's privates are like Mars...

It took a team of scientists decades to find moisture on it.

17 Lemurs Who Aren't Mad, They're Just Disappointed

You’ve really let these patient prosimians down…

This lemur, who just doesn't know what to do with you anymore:

This lemur, who just doesn't know what to do with you anymore:

Mathias Appel / Via Flickr: mathiasappel

This guy, who can't even deal with your shit right now:

This guy, who can't even deal with your shit right now:

Tommaso Perusini / Via Flickr: korso87

This fella, who can barely believe what he is seeing right now:

This fella, who can barely believe what he is seeing right now:

Mariusz Kluzniak / Via Flickr: 39997856@N03

This black and white ruffed lemur, who is making it clear you best get out of its sight ASAP:

This black and white ruffed lemur, who is making it clear you best get out of its sight ASAP:

Toshihiro Gamo / Via Flickr: dakiny


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