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Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.

Thứ Năm, 3 tháng 3, 2016

A Rescued Lion, Tiger, And Bear Have Become The Best Of Friends

A lion, a tiger, a bear, oh my.

A lion, a tiger, and a bear have formed an adorable friendship after being rescued as cubs 15 years ago.

A lion, a tiger, and a bear have formed an adorable friendship after being rescued as cubs 15 years ago.

Facebook: NoahsArkAnimalSanctuary

Baloo the black bear, Leo the lion, and Shere Khan the tiger came to Noah's Ark Animal Sanctuary (NAAS) in California after being found in a basement during a drug raid in Atlanta. All three were malnourished and infected with parasites.

Baloo the black bear, Leo the lion, and Shere Khan the tiger came to Noah's Ark Animal Sanctuary (NAAS) in California after being found in a basement during a drug raid in Atlanta. All three were malnourished and infected with parasites.

Facebook: NoahsArkAnimalSanctuary

However, all three fully recovered and now live happily together at the sanctuary.

However, all three fully recovered and now live happily together at the sanctuary.

Facebook: BearLionTiger

Shere Kahn has been described as the "mischievous, affectionate" one.

Shere Kahn has been described as the "mischievous, affectionate" one.

noahs-ark.org


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If Donald Trump replaces Barack Obama in the White House

Does that mean that orange is the new black?

A zookeeper notices his prize gorilla was getting aggressive..

She wouldn't eat. She wouldn't sleep. And she constantly kept trying to attack the zookeeper. So, he did some research and found out female gorillas can become depressed and aggressive when deprived from sex.

The zookeeper then looked around for another male gorilla for her to engage in intercourse, but unfortunately the zoo couldn't afford to import a male gorilla just for her to have sex.

Giving his funding situation, he goes up to the janitor and asks him "Hey, for $500, would you have sex with this gorilla?"

The janitor thought about it for a minute, and then replied "Sure, on three conditions. First condition, I don't want to kiss her."

"Okay sure! I wouldn't expect you to!"

The janitor then stated "Second condition. I don't want anyone knowing about this ordeal."

"Sure, fine! Not a problem! What's your third condition?"

Janitor said "Give me at least 2 weeks to come up with the $500"

Edit: a word

Q: How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Whereas the party of the first part, also known as "Lawyer", and the party of the second part, also known as "Light Bulb", do hereby and forthwith agree to a transaction wherein the party of the second part shall be removed from the current position as a result of failure to perform previously agreed upon duties, i.e., the lighting, elucidation, and otherwise illumination of the area ranging from the front (north) door, through the entryway, terminating at an area just inside the primary living area, demarcated by the beginning of the carpet, any spillover illumination being at the option of the party of the second part and not required by the aforementioned agreement between the parties.

The aforementioned removal transaction shall include, but not be limited to, the following. The party of the first part shall, with or without elevation at his option, by means of a chair, stepstool, ladder or any other means of elevation, grasp the party of the second part and rotate the party of the second part in a counter-clockwise direction, this point being tendered non-negotiable. Upon reaching a point where the party of the second part becomes fully detached from the receptacle, the party of the first part shall have the option of disposing of the party of the second part in a manner consistent with all relevant and applicable local, state and federal statutes. Once separation and disposal have been achieved, the party of the first part shall have the option of beginning installation. Aforesaid installation shall occur in a manner consistent with the reverse of the procedures described in step one of this self-same document, being careful to note that the rotation should occur in a clockwise direction, this point also being non-negotiable. The above described steps may be performed, at the option of the party of the first part, by any or all agents authorized by him, the objective being to produce the most possible revenue for the Partnership.


(source: /usr/bin/fortune )

A woman got breast implants made of wood...

It would be funny if this joke had a punch line... wooden tit

When my girlfriend said she was leaving because of my obsession with The Monkees, I thought she was joking.

And then I saw her face.

Osama Bin Laden, Josef Stalin and Hitler are robbing a bank, who do the cops shoot first?

A black guy