Terrible joke. Only 3 stars.
Thứ Năm, 9 tháng 11, 2017
A virgin from a traditional family tells her grandmother she's going on her first date.
The grandmother says,
"Sit here and let me tell you about these young boys.
He is going to try to kiss you. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that.
He is going to try to feel your breasts. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that.
He is going to try to put his hand between your legs. You are going to like that, but don't let him do that.
Most importantly, he is going to try to get on top of you and have his way with you. Don't let him do that; it will disgrace our family."
Keeping this advice in mind, the virgin goes on her date and afterwards can hardly wait to tell her grandmother about it.
"It went just like you said!" she says. "But I didn't let him disgrace our family. When he tried that, I got on top of him and disgraced his family."
A Blonde was down on her luck
In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom.
She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him, "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, Blonde."
The Blonde then taped the note to the kid`s shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree.
The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said,
"How could you do this to a fellow Blonde?"
A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door.
She goes to the door opens it and sees a man standing there. He asks the lady, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door in disgust. The next morning she hears a knock at the door, it's the same man and he asks the same question to the woman, "Do you have a Vagina?" She slams the door again. Later that night when her husband gets home she tell him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells his wife in a loving and concerned voice, "Honey I am taking an off tomorrow so as to be home, just incase this guy shows up again." The next morning they hear a knock at the door and both ran to the door. The husband whispered to the wife, "Honey, I'm going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where he's going with this." She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there, he asks, "Do you have a Vagina?" "Yes I do," says the lady. The man replies, "Good, would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours!"
Einstein, Newton and Pascal decide to play hide and seek.
Einstein is it, closes his eyes, counts to 10 then opens them.
Pascal is no where to be seen. Newton is sitting right in front of Einstein, with a piece of chalk in his hand. He’s sitting in a square drawn on the ground, a meter to a side.
Einstein says “Newton, you’re terrible, I’ve found you!” Newton says “No no, Einy. You’ve found one Newton per square meter. You’ve found Pascal!”
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