The Opioid Crisis Is Not Just An American Epidemic

The Opioid Crisis Is Not Just An American Epidemic
Nigeria is facing catastrophic levels of opioid addiction — and no one seems to know how to stop it.

May 21, 2018 at 06:34PM
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My wife told me to go an get some pills that help with an erection...

You should've seen her face when I tossed her some diet pills.

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SMS

I was on sofa next to my wife who was eating and typing on her phone. So I heard my phone ringing at the kitchen where I was charging it. So I went to check , the sms was from my wife and she wrote "bring the salt on your way back."

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Hear that Bruce Lee had a vegetarian son?

Brock Lee.

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A teenage girl was having sex with her boyfriend...

at her parent's house. Her father, after being woken by the noises, goes upstairs to check it out; and walks in on them.

"Dad!" she exclaimed in a panic "...I'm sorry"

The dad being, a dad, replies "hi sorry, I'm Dad!"

He then turns to the boyfriend and asks "Are you fucking sorry?"

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An old blind man walks into an all-girl biker bar by mistake

He finds his way to a bar stool and orders some coffee. After sitting there for a while, he yells to the waiter, "hey, you wanna hear a blonde joke?"

The bar immediately falls silent. In a deep husky voice the woman next to him says, "before you tell that joke, i think it's only fair, given that you are blind, that you should know five things:

1. The bartender is a blonde girl with a baseball bat.
2. The bouncer is a blonde girl.
3. I'm a 6 foot tall 175 pound blonde woman with a black belt in karate
4. The woman sitting next to me is a blonde and a professional weight lifter.
5. The lady to your right is a blonde and a professional wrestler.

Now, think about it seriously mister, do you still wanna tell that joke?"

The blind man thinks for a second, shakes his head and mutters, "No...not if i'm gonna have to explain it five times."

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A Priest, Rabbi and Atheist walk into a bar and each ask for a drink

The bartender, saying nothing and looking disdained, points to a sign clearly labelled: NO JOKES SERVED HERE

Without a fight the Priest, Rabbi and Atheist leave the bar, heads hanging.

The next day a chicken walks in and plops down on the barstool.

Wiping the inside of a glass, the bartender approaches and asks the chicken “Are you part of this joke?”

“Yeah.” the chicken replies.

Again, he points to the sign: NO JOKES SERVED HERE

The chicken argues “Well then how’s a chicken supposed to get his beak wet?”

The bartender pointed out the window and said “There’s another bar across the road.”

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