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Chủ Nhật, 1 tháng 7, 2018

$50 is $50

Buddy and his wife Edna went to the state fair every year, and every year Buddy would say,
'Edna,I'd like to ride in that helicopter'
Edna always replied,
'I know Buddy, but that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks'
One year Buddy and Edna went to the fair, and Buddy said,
'Edna, I'm 85 years old. If I don't ride that helicopter, I might never get another chance'
To this, Edna replied,
"Buddy that helicopter ride is fifty bucks, and fifty bucks is fifty bucks'
The pilot overheard the couple and said,
'Folks I'll make you a deal. I'll take the both of you for a ride. If you can stay quiet for the entire ride and don't say a word I won't charge you a penny! But if you say one word it's fifty dollars.'
Buddy and Edna agreed and up they went.
The pilot did all kinds of fancy moves, but not a word was heard. He did his daredevil tricks over and over again, but still not a word...
When they landed, the pilot turned to Buddy and said,
'By golly, I did everything I could to get you to yell out, but you didn't. I'm impressed!'
Buddy replied,
'Well, to tell you the truth, I almost said something when Edna fell out, but you know, Fifty bucks is fifty bucks!'

If I was a cop I would be ticketing people for not using their turn signals..

Left and right

An officer pulls over a car with 5 elder women on the freeway.

Approaching the car he notices the women in the back of the car are pale white and wide eyed.

The women was visibly confused about being pulled over and asked, “ Why was I pulled over I was going exactly 22 mph?

The officer tells her she wasn’t speeding but she was going a lot slower than the speed limit.

She responds I was going the exact speed limit 22 MPH.

He laughs and says the that was the route number and not the speed limit.

The women smiled out of embarrassment and thanked the officer.

Just before the officer walked off he asked if everyone is ok in the car.

The women responds, “They will be in a minute. We just got off route 119.”

A Cultural Vacuum In Trump's White House


A Cultural Vacuum In Trump's White House
This White House has been, and is likely to remain, home to the first presidency in American history that is almost completely devoid of culture.

June 30, 2018 at 09:26PM
via Digg https://ift.tt/2tI8qBL

My girlfriend, Ruth, fell off the back of my motorcycle

I rode on, ruthlessly

My father always told me you gotta fight fire with fire

Great guy, horrible firefighter.

Turned 18 today, so I bought a locket and put my own picture in it. Guess I really am

independent