Boo tea.
(Courtesy of my 6 year old)
Chủ Nhật, 30 tháng 6, 2019
A man dies and goes to Hell...
Given his cruel, sadistic streak, the demons really like this guy and start giving him some say in how the day-to-day life of Hell can be made more Hellish for the other souls. He introduces bizarre new forms of torture on an almost daily basis.
One day, the man comes up with his darkest, most ingenious torture ever. However, it requires removing all light from Hell. He goes over his idea with one of the demons.
"I like it, I like it!" says the Demon. "But I don't have the authority to make a change like that. We have to speak to someone far more evil than I am."
So they go to this giant gilded door, walk in, and see a large, horned devil standing inside. Intimidated, the man starts squirming and asks, "Who is that?" "That's Beelzebub, one of the seven princes of Hell."
They explain their plan to Beelzebub. "I like it, I like it!" says Beelzebub. "But I don't have the authority to make a change like that. We have to speak to someone far more evil than I am."
The man, the demon, and Beelzebub all go to a magnificent castle. Inside, on a chair, is an enormous horned devil more fearsome than Beelzebub. Even Beelzebub looks intimidated. "Who is that?" whispers the man. "That's Satan himself!" replies the demon.
They explain their plan to Satan. "I like it, I like it!" says Satan. "But I don't have the authority to make a change like that. We have to speak to someone far more evil than I am."
The man, the demon, Beelzebub, and Satan all approach this magnificent stone spire, climb up it, blow a horn, and down comes a rather unassuming-looking office worker in a button-down shirt. Satan starts looking intimidated by his evilness. "Who's that?" whispers the hellbound man. "That's the guy who made Reddit's 'Promoted' ad content now appear three or five posts down the subs' feeds rather than in a banner at the top."
California Was Warned 30 Years Ago About Climate Change. Now It's Feeling The Effects
California Was Warned 30 Years Ago About Climate Change. Now It's Feeling The Effects
A report issued in 1989 warned that California would see more droughts, floods, and fires under climate change.
June 29, 2019 at 11:00PM
via Digg https://ift.tt/2FHYtdB
When I was 12, I lived with my abusive uncle and auntie
We lived on an old farm, no animals just fields.
My uncle goes off to a market and comes back with this filthy ass horse.
Says it's bred from some old bloke's prize stallion.
Auntie loves it for some reason, coz it's all muddy she calls it "Dirty". She was a bit weird like that. I, being a countryside kid, liked horses and riding them.
Then they turned on me saying "If we ever catch you riding our fucking horse then we will beat the living shit out of you".
They meant it, they'd done it before.
Few days later, I'm messing in the fields with some old tractor tire I found.
Dirty is just eating grass and shit next to me.
Auntie and uncle come out every few minutes to make sure I'm not riding the horse.
Get bored and climb inside the tire.
Tire starts moving (field wasn't flat).
Can't stop.
Auntie and uncle come outside to check on me.
They see me rollin'
They hatin'
Patrolling
Trying to catch me ridin’ Dirty.
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