A re-seeding airline!
This joke sucks but it's my cakeday and I was told there would be plentiful imaginary internet points .... XD
Thứ Ba, 10 tháng 9, 2019
Thứ Hai, 9 tháng 9, 2019
Trump jokes trump all the time
Trump is visiting a class in an elementary school where they are talking about words and meanings. The teacher asks Trump if he would like to lead the class in a discussion of the word “tragedy”. (No, not the punch line yet)
Trump agrees to then asks the class for an example of a tragedy. One little boy stands up: “If my best friend who lives on a farm is playing in a field and a runaway tractor comes along and knocks him dead, that’d be a tragedy.”
“Not quite”, says Mr. Trump, “that would be an accident.”
A little girl then raises her hand: “If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy.”
“I’m afraid not,” explained the president. “That’s what we would call a great loss.”
The room goes silent. Trump searches the room. “Isn’t there someone else here who can give me an example of a tragedy? “
Finally, at the back of the room, little Johnny raises his hand. In a quiet voice he says: “If Air Force One, carrying you Mr. President, was struck by a missile and blown to smithereens, that would be a tragedy.”
“Fantastic!” exclaimed Mr. Trump. “That’s right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?”
“Well” said little Johnny, “because it sure as hell wouldn’t be a great loss and probably wouldn’t be an accident either.”
My wife said she would rather commit suicide than have dementia
She said she would never want to place that burden on me..
I said, honey that's the fifth time you've told me that.
With a very seductive voice the woman asked her husband…
“Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?”
“No,” said her husband.
She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 buttons of her blouse, slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silky push-up bra, and pulled out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and smiled approvingly.
She then asked him, “Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all crumpled up?”
“Uh… no, I haven’t,” he said, with an anxious tone in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile, pulled up her skirt and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill and started breathing a little more quickly with anticipation.
“Now,” she said, “have you ever seen $50,000 Dollars all crumpled up?”
“No way!” he said, while obviously becoming even more aroused and excited, to which she replied …
“Go look in the garage!”
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