Funny Story

FunnyStory about animals and all around the world

Thứ Ba, 1 tháng 10, 2019

The Navy found they had too many officers and decided to offer an early retirement bonus.

They promised any officer who volunteered for Retirement a bonus of $1,000 for every inch measured in a straight line between any Two points in his body.. The officer got to choose what those two points would be. The first officer who accepted asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of ...his toes. He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000. The second officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes. He walked Out with $96,000. The...

You never see elephants hiding in trees

I guess they must be really good at it...

Why are Americans so stupid?

Because it's only the ones who skip school who survive....

Two crocodiles sitting at the side of the river.

Two Crocodiles were sitting at the side of the River.The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said, 'I can't understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same size as kids - I just don't get it.' 'Well,' said the big Croc, 'what have you been eating?' 'Politicians, same as you,' replied the small Croc. 'Hmm. Well, where do you catch them?' 'On the other side of the river near the Parliament car park in Pretoria. 'Same here. Hmm.....How do you catch them?' asked the big Croc.'Well, I crawl up under one of...

Hey girl, are you a newspaper?

Because there’s a new issue with you every single day...

Why will congress never impeach Trump?

Because the republicans always insist on carrying a baby to full term....

I had a dream last night that I had a Magnesium deficiency.....

...I was like 0mg...