Until I rode pasta....
Thứ Bảy, 16 tháng 1, 2021
Thứ Sáu, 15 tháng 1, 2021
A woman joins a country club and when she hears the guys talking about their golf round, she says, "I played on my college's golf team. I was pretty good. Mind if I join you next week?" No one wants to say 'yes', but they're on the spot…
Finally, one man says, "Okay, but we start at 6:30 a.m."
He figures the early tee-time will discourage her.
The woman says this may be a problem and asks if she can be up to 15 minutes late.
They roll their eyes, but say, "Okay."
She's there at 6:30 am. sharp and beats all of them with an eye-opening 2-under par round.
She's fun and pleasant and the guys are impressed.
They congratulate her and invite her back the next week.
She smiles, and says, "I'll be there at 6:30, or 6:45."
The next week she again shows up at 6:30 sharp.
Only this time,...
A group of golfers get stuck behind a really slow group
Four golfers (a doctor, a lawyer, a priest, and an engineer) are stuck behind a really slow group of golfers. They start to get frustrated, so they call up the course's pro.
"Hey, how come you're letting guys like this on the course? They're hitting their balls all over the place, spending way too much time lining up their putts, always in the sand traps...and they don't see us trying to play through!"
The pro says, "Well, you see, last year there was an awful fire at the clubhouse. And these four firemen were injured fighting the blaze. They...
I didn’t feel like cooking tonight, so I made a sandwich for dinner
It wasn’t so much as a sandwich as much as it was just bread.
I guess more just grain.
Fermented grain.
Distilled, fermented grain.
I had whisky for dinner tonight....
500 bricks on a plane
Q. There are 500 bricks on a plane, one falls off, how many left?
A. 499
Q. What are the 3 simple steps of putting an elephant in a refrigerator?
A. Open refrigerator, put elephant in, close refrigerator.
Q. What are the 4 simple steps of putting a giraffe in a refrigerator?
A. Open refrigerator, take elephant out, put giraffe in, close refrigerator.
Q. It's the lions birthday and he invites everyone in the jungle. Everyone turns up but one animal, what animal is it and why?
A. The giraffe, he's in the refrigerator.
Q. Sally is an explorer. She...
Two CEOs meet after....
One of them has visited Japan. So they are talking about how the trip was and one says:
"look I got this amazing robot secretary from there, it does everything human secretary does except 20 times faster and 200% more efficiently."
The other one says: "that sounds impressive but does she do... You know other things?"
"You're welcome to take her for a spin" winks the first one.
So the other one takes her to the toilet and after fifteen minutes agonizing screams are heard from the toilet.
The first CEO slaps himself on the forehead and yells: "Shit!...
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