You cannot RUN through a campsite, you can only RAN through a campsite.

Because it's past tents

Read More

The body’s organs were arguing over who should be in charge

"I should be in charge," said the brain , "I run all the body's systems, without me nothing would happen."

"I should be in charge," said the heart , "I circulate oxygen and nutrients all over."

"No! I should be in charge," said the stomach, "I process the food that gives us energy."

"I should be in charge," said the legs, "without me the body couldn't go anywhere."

"I should be in charge," said the eyes, "I allow the body to see where it goes."

"I should be in charge," said the anus, "I am responsible for waste removal."

All of the other body parts laughed at the anus and insulted him, so he decided to go on strike.

Within a few days, the brain had a terrible headache, the stomach was bloated, the legs got wobbly, the eyes got watery, and the heart pumped toxic blood. They all decided that the anus should be the boss.

What is the moral of the story? Even though everybody else does all of the work, the asshole is usually in charge.

Read More

I have like 50 jokes about unemployment

But none of them work.

Read More

I was kidnapped by a gang of mimes.

They did unspeakable things to me.

Read More

My wife: You need to do more chores around the house.

Me: Can we change the subject?

My wife: Ok, more chores around the house need to be done by you.

Read More

If you lose one of your senses, your other sense are enhanced.

This is why people with no sense of humour have a heightened sense of self-importance.

Read More

Is it "Happy Impeachment" or "Merry Impeachment"?

I don't want to offend anyone.

​

Treason's Greetings and Impeach Navidad!

Read More