Gay, definitely gay
Thứ Hai, 7 tháng 6, 2021
Jack and John decided to go skiing.
They loaded up their mini van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they were caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door,if they could spend the night.
"I realize its terrible weather out there and I have this huge house to myself, but I'm recently widowed".She explained " I'm afraid the neighbours will talk if I let you in".
"Don't worry" John said. " We'll be happy to sleep in the barn and if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light".
The lady agreed, the 2 men slept in the barn and left at first light. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing.
But about 9 months later, John got a letter from an attorney and it took him some time to figure it out. He determined it was from the attorney of the widow they met during their skiing trip.
He dropped in on his friend Jack.
John: Jack, do you remember that good looking widow that we met on that skiing weekend?
Jack: Yes I do.
John: Be honest with me Jack, did you pay her a visit at the middle of the night?
Jack( looks a bit embarrassed now) : Yes John, I did.
John: Now tell me this Jack, did you give her my name and address instead of yours?
Jack( his face now beet red with embarrassment) : I'm sorry buddy, I'm afraid I did. Why do you ask?
John: She just died and left me everything.
Topless carwash
So these kids in school are trying to find new ways to raise money. They suggest a few ideas, all of which are shot down by their teacher. Finally a kid says ‘I get it! We should do a topless carwash!’
Very carefully, the teacher asks: ‘what do you mean?’
The kid says, ‘well, we can’t reach the roofs of the cars, so we will just do the sides and the front and back’
Toilet Pain
A drunk gets up from the bar and heads for the bathroom. A few minutes later, a loud, blood curdling scream is heard from the bathroom. A few minutes after that, another loud scream reverberates through the bar.
The bartender goes into the bathroom to investigate why the drunk is screaming. "What's all the screaming about in there? You're scaring the customers!"
"I'm just sitting here on the toilet and every time I try to flush, something comes up and squeezes the hell out of my testicles."
With that, the bartender opens the door, looks in and says..."You idiot! You're sitting on the mop bucket!"
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