The sign read:
A sale of two titties
Thứ Tư, 11 tháng 8, 2021
2 nuns are in a car at a stop light in Transylvania when a vampire blocks their car...
One nun says to the other “Quick sister, show him your cross!”
The other nun rolls down the window and yells “Get the bloody hell out of middle of the road asshole!”
Girls, if your man starts acting weird while sexting;
Send him a picture of a naked grandma, then send him a picture of your boobs. He just needs turning off and back on again.
An old joke I can't find on Reddit. Here we go...
Two sisters, one blonde and one brunette, inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from re-possessing the ranch they need to purchase a bull from a stockyard in a far-away town so that they can breed their own stock. They only have $600 left.
Upon leaving, the brunette tells her sister, "When I get there, if I decide to buy the bull, I'll contact you to drive out after me and haul it home."
The brunette arrives at the stockyard, inspects the bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she drives to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram to tell her the news.
She walks into the telegraph office, and says, "I want to send a telegram to my sister telling her that I've bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home."
The telegraph operator explains that he'll be glad to help her, then adds, "It's just 99 cents a word." Well, after paying for the bull, the brunette only has $1 left. She realizes that she'll only be able to send her sister one word. After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, "I want you to send her the word "comfortable." The operator shakes his head. "How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to your pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word "comfortable?"
The brunette explains, "My sister's blonde. The word's big. She'll read it very slowly... com-for-da-bull."
2 college students accidentally miss the math final exam
The next day they both went to plead with their professor. He was feeling pretty good that day so he allowed them to retake it. He told them to both come back tomorrow for an oral exam. When they both showed up he told one of them to wait outside while he tests the other. So one enters and the other puts his ear to the door to listen. The professor begins asking the question:
“You are riding in a trait cart and you get too hot. What do you do?”
The student replies “I open the window.”
“Ok. Now that window is 2 feet wide and 3 feet high. The train is traveling 50 mph going north and the wind is blowing at 15 mph due east. How long will it take for new air to replace the old air in the cart?”
The student is clearly confused at this impossible question and just answers “I don’t know”. So the professor gives him an F, dismisses him, and calls in his friend.
He begins asking his friend “you are riding in a train cart and it gets too hot. What do you do?
He says “I take my jacket off.”
“Ok. But its still too hot. What do you do?”
“I take my shirt off.”
“I understand but its very, very hot.”
“I will just get naked.”
“Ok. But there’s a guy in front of you getting a hard on by watching you strip naked!”
The student replies: “Professor, the entire train can fuck me in the ass I am NOT opening that window!”
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