The husband store

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates: "You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increases as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!" - So, a woman goes to the store to find a husband. - On the first floor...

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An attractive young woman on a flight from Ireland asked the priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favor?"

“Of course child. What may I do for you?" "Well, I bought my mother an expensive hair dryer for her birthday. It is unopened but well over the customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Hide it under your robes perhaps?" "I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you, I will not lie." "With your honest face, Father, no one will question you," she replied. When they got to Customs, she let the priest go first. The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?" "From...

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A Cop Pulls a Little Old Lady Over for Speeding

Cop pulls over a little old lady and asks for her licence and registration. When she pulls out her wallet, he sees a handgun in her purse. "Ma'am, is that a gun in your purse?" "Yes, Officer, it's a .38 Smith & Wesson revolver." "Please place that purse on the passenger seat, Ma'am, and don't make any sudden moves towards it. Do you have any other weapons I should know about?" "Well, there's a Colt 1911 automatic in the glove compartment..." "Okay, let's stay away from that side of the car. Anything else?" "I got a .22 Derringer in my bra,...

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What do you call a depressed acapella group?

Self Harmony...

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Your mom is so slow,

She took 9 months to make a joke....

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Mommy, what were you doing bouncing on Daddy's stomach last night?

-I have to do that or Daddy's belly gets very fat. Bouncing keeps him skinny. -That's not going to work. -Why not? -Because the babysitter keeps blowing him back up....

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Set your wifi password to 2444666668888888

So when someone ask tell them it's 12345678...

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