Honey, you know that new washing machine we just bought..

A wife had just made her husband a nice breakfast as she was in need of a few things and her husband was just a complete A** Hole.

So, the husband is reading the paper, and the wife says, "Honey, you know that new washing machine we just bought, well something is wrong with it, it won't go into the spin cycle and I was hoping you could take a look at it and see if you could fix it."

Husband lowers the news paper and says, "What do I look like, the Maytag repair man, you call up the place where we bought that washer and you have somebody come out and fix it."

Wife continues, "Honey, you know that truck we just got, well it won't go into reverse, I was hoping you could take a look at it and see if you couldn't fix it."

Husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Good Wrench? You call up the place where we got that truck and you have somebody else come out and fix it."

Husband leaves for work and there is a knock at the door. It is the neighbor, Fred.

Fred says, "I couldn't help but over hear your conversation with your husband and I think I could help you out.. I can take a look at your truck and your washer and I think I can fix them for you."

Wife says, "Oh, Fred that would be wonderful. But what would you want for helping?"

Fred says, "Well you can either bake me a cake or give me a blow job"

Later the husband comes home and wife says, "Fred came over and he fixed the the truck and the washer."

Husband says, "Oh no. Fred never does anything for free. What did he want for helping?"

Wife says, "Well he said I can either bake him a cake or give him a blow job"

Husband says, "And what did you do??"

Wife says, "Well what do I look like, Betty Crocker?"