An old lady was stopped for speeding

Police officer: I'm sorry, but I think you were driving a bit too fast?

Old lady: What?! No, that can't be true!

Police officer: Can I see your drivers license?

Old lady: No, I don't have it anymore. I lost it 4 years ago when driving while drunk!

Police officer: Well.. Can I see the car's registration?

Old lady: Umm. I don't have that either. The car is stolen.

Police officer: Okay... So who did you steal it from?

Old lady: I don't really know his name. I shot him, cut him into pieces and put him in the back of the car.

Police officer(shaken): One moment madam.

The police officer returns to his car to call for backup. A few moments later three police cars show up, along with the police captain. The police captain walks up to the car.

Police captain: Excuse me madam. My police officer told me you have a dead man in your car?

Old lady: Whaat? No that isn't true!

Police captain: Do you mind if I check?

Old lady: Sure, go ahead!

The police captain checks and finds no dead body. He returns to the window.

Police captain: Well, that was odd. He told me you had killed someone to steal the car. Do you have the car's registration?

Old lady: Sure! Here it is!

She hands him the cars registration.

Police captain: How about your driving license?

Old lady: Yup, here you go.

Hands him her driving license as well.

Police captain: Well this is odd. My police officer told me that you didn't have a driving license, nor the registration for the car!

Old lady: What?! Well then I bet the liar also told you that I was speeding?!