Chủ Nhật, 19 tháng 5, 2019

The auditor goes to the synagogue

The auditor is on a fining spree; he went through his list and every business in town got fined for irregularities. He checks is list

done

done

done

not yet done

"What's that?" he thinks. He reads: synagogue. "I'll go there NOW"

The rabbi and all the administrators are extremely meticulous and precise; he checks everything, all the accounts and invoices and everything is flawlessly registered. There's really nothing to fine there.

He starts going out, quite disappointed, when he notices a small box.

"What's in that box?" he asks

"ah, you see sir, in our rites we use candles. We tend to spare, and at the end of the rite we collect the melted wax, and we put it in that small box. At the end of the year we send it to the candle factory, they melt everything together and they send us back four candles for free, which we use again for our rites."

The auditor wants to check. Well, the rabbi has EVERYTHING registered: the number of candles, the weight of the wax, ... there's really nothing to fine.

He starts walking through the door, even more disappointed, but there's another small box:

"what's in that box?" he asks

"ah, you see sir, in our rites we use wine. And at the end of the rites we collect all the corks, and we put them in that small box. At the end of the year we send it to the corks factory, and they send us back four corks for free, which we use again for our wine bottles."

The auditor think "this time I got you". But again, the rabbi has really EVERYTHING registered: the number of bottles, the number of corks, the weight of the corks, ... there's really really nothing to justify a fine.

He is morally destroyed, feeling like a failure. He is already on the street, and then a thought flashes in his mind:

"But Rabbi!" he asks "do you still do circumcisions here?"

"Yes". Gotcha:

"And what to you do with the leftover skin?"

The rabbi points to a wooden box:

"Yeah, we put them all together in that box, which once a year we ship to the auditing company, and they send us a dickhead"

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