A burglar had broken into a house...

... and as he was feeling his way through a darkened room, he heard a voice. "Jesus is watching you!"

The burglar was startled and stood still for a few moments. Then he decided to continue his search for valuables. Once again, he heard the voice, a little louder, "Jesus is still watching you!"

"What's going on?" he thought. He waited a little longer before continuing his search. Again, he heard "Jesus is watching you!"

The burglar couldn't stand it any longer. He switched on his flashlight, and there, sitting on the perch, was a parrot.

"Was that you talking?" Asked the burglar.

"Yes," said the parrot.

"Well, you talk pretty well," said the burglar.

"I've been talking for fifty years," said the parrot.

"You gave me a fright when I came in," said the burglar. "What's your name?"

"Alfred," replied the parrot.

"That's a pretty weird name for a parrot," said the burglar.

"Yeah, but not as weird as 'Jesus' for a rottweiler."