I just join reddit and suddenly discover that my name is on the front page!

wow! 12 upvotes!

Edit1: So I promised gold to u/_PM_ME_YOUR_SECRETS_ if he'd PM me his secret. He did. I lied.

Edit2: Holipoop it's on the rising page. The duck knight rises! Rise my minions! RISE!!!

Edit3: Some of you wanna know u/_PM_ME_YOUR_SECRETS_'s secret. Tell you what, gold me and I'll publish it to the world.