There was a king ready to abdicate.

So he brought in his 3 sons. He tells them, "Each of you will receive a trial, the first to complete their trial will become king."

Beginning with his eldest son, a brave and foolhardy man of great stature he says, "You are to bring me your grandmother's emerald ring, lost decades ago in the wreck of the Windbreaker, from the bottom of the stormy North Sea." "Right away, Father." said the eldest son, departing at once, determined to become king.

Then to his middle son, Nimble and Self-righteous, "You are to retrieve your great grandfather's shield, bearing our coat of arms, from the deadly jungles of India, lost at the site of a battle since forgotten." "I shall do so at once, Father." said the middle son, and so he too departed at once.

Then he beckoned for his youngest son, a young man Intelligent, but meek next to his older siblings, to approach. "Yes, Father?" The son inquired. To which the King replies, "Bring me a coke, I never liked those assholes."