If only there was an easier way

Paddy and Paddy, two Irishmen, went out one day and each bought a pig.

When they got home, Paddy turned to Paddy and said, "Paddy, me ol'mate, how
are we going to tell who owns which Fookin' Pig?"

Paddy says, "Well Paddy, I'll cut one of te ears off my Fookin Pig, and ten
we can tell them apart."

"Ah, dat id be grand," says Paddy.

This worked fine until a couple of weeks later, when Paddy stormed into the
house. "Paddy" he said, "Your Fookin Pig has chewed the ear off my Fookin
Pig. Now we got two fookin pigs with one ear each. How are we going to tell
who owns which fookin pig.?"

"Well Paddy," says Paddy,"I'll cut ta other ear off my fookin pig. Ten we'll
ave two fookin pigs and only one of them will avan ear".

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

Again, this worked fine until a couple of weeks later, when Paddy again
stormed into the house. "Paddy", he said, "Your fookin pig has chewed the
other ear offa my fookin pig!!!." "Now, we got two fookin pigs with no
fookin ears!!!. How we gonna tell who owns which fookin pig?"

"Ah, dis is serious, Paddy" said Paddy. " I'll tell ya what I'll do. I'll
cut de tail offa my fookin pig. Den we'll av two fookin pigs with no fookin
ears and only one fookin tail."

"Ah tat'd be grand" says Paddy.

Another couple of weeks went by and..........you guessed it, Paddy stormed
into the house once more. "PADDY," shouted Paddy, "YOUR FOOKIN PIG HAS
CHEWED THE FOOKIN TAIL OFFA MY FOOKIN PIG, AND NOW WE GOT TWO FOOKIN PIGS
WITH NO FOOKIN EARS AND NO FOOKIN TAILS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. HOW DE FOOK ARE WE
GONNA FOOKIN TELL 'EM APART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Ah, Fook it" says Paddy, "how's about you have the black one, and I'll have
the white one"