I went to the doctor the other day. He told me I could have a stroke at any time. It was nice of him to give me permission to masturbate like that!
I went to the doctor for a checkup the other day. The Doctor walked in looking at his clipboard and said "Well, it looks like you're gonna have to stop masturbating". I replied "Why? Is it a health risk?"
The doctor replied "No, but this is a doctor's office and it's very inappropriate."
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