Thứ Hai, 21 tháng 12, 2020

There was a businessman whose wife was REALLY into sex.

He was a hardworking guy but still managed to satisfy his wife's needs.

One time he had to leave for another country for a business meet. He would've been gone for a week. He knew his wife's sex drive and didn't want to take risks so he thought he should gift her something so she can satisfy herself and doesn't think about searching for a new partner so he went to an adult toy shop.

As soon as he entered the first thing he saw was a blow up doll but soon dismissed the thought of buying it since it's almost like another human, he then proceeded to the dildos section.

There he saw all kinds of dildos, from massive to tiny to ones which glow in the dark but none of them grabbed his interest so he decided he'll go somewhere else and begins to leave the shop when he was stopped by the owner sitting behind the cash counter.

"I know what you're looking for", the owner says

This grabbed the businessman's attention and he stopped to hear what the owner had to say.

"There was a man many years ago who looked just like you, wealthy but tired. He had a wife whom he couldn't satisfy and she was about to leave him when he came here and got my help. He's happily married since then"

"How exactly did you help him?" Asked the businessman.

The cashier bent down and revealed an engraved wooden box from under the counter. There were all sorts of symbols on the box. He opens it and inside it was a pink latex dildo, similar to the ones on the shelf.

"This is an ancient artifact haunted by a Maori tribe who all died of sex deprivation when all the women of their village were killed in a plague, all their souls now reside in this dildo", said the owner.

The businessman being a sceptical guy laughed and then turns to leave.

The owner says, "You're all the same, thinking there's nothing above this material plane of existence. Watch this."

The businessman turns around.

"Voodoo Dildo, keyhole"

To his astonishment, the businessman saw the box violently shake and the dildo rise in the air, float for a second and hover over to the keyhole in the front door and start to fuck it. The dildo fucked the keyhole with such force that the door unhinged and started cracking.

"Voodoo Dildo, box"

The dildo stops fucking the door and returns to the box.

"ILL TAKE IT", screamed the businessman, and after a lot of negotiation he finally purchased the dildo and ran home.

He tells his wife about the dildo and how to use it. "Voodoo Dildo, pussy. That's how you activate it", the businessman told his wife and went on his business trip.

After 3 days of being horny the wife finally gave into her urges and opened the wooden box, took out the dildo and uttered "Voodoo Dildo, pussy". The dildo shot from her hands and started fucking her. First slowly and then changing speed as the way she wanted.

After an hour of fucking, the wife thought it was enough and she grabbed the dildo. But it didn't stop fucking her. Her husband had forgot to tell her how to stop the dildo. She started panicking and called him but he didn't pick up so she started to dress up and go for the hospital, all the while the dildo still fucking her.

She got in her car and started driving. On the way she had a huge orgasm and her car served and almost hit another car. A police car saw this and she was stopped at the side of the highway. A policeman approached her.

"Ma'am you almost hit the grey SUV back there, have you been drinking?"

The wife then proceeds to tell him all about her husband and the voodoo Dildo and that she can't stop it now.

The policeman then says,

"Yeah right, Voodoo Dildo my ass."

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