John: Is there a problem officer?
Cop: You were going at least 75 in a 55 zone
John: No, I was only going 65 tops
John's girlfriend: Oh John, you were going 80
John gives his girlfriend a nasty look
Cop: I'm also writing you a ticket for your broken taillight
John: Oh crap, I didn't even know that my taillight was broken
John's girlfriend: Oh John, you've known about that taillight since we started dating
John gave his girlfriend another nasty look
Cop: I'm also going to have to cite you for not wearing your seatbelt
John: I just unbuckled my belt when you started walking to my car
John's girlfriend: Oh John, you never wear your seatbelt
John: I swear to God, I will beat the living shit out of you if you don't STFU, bitch!
Cop: Ma'am, does your boyfriend always talk to you like this?
John's girlfriend: Nope, only when he's drunk
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