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Thứ Hai, 15 tháng 12, 2014

Canadian knock-knock joke


Knock knock.


Who's there?


Sorry.


No I'm sorry.


No I'm sorry.



We're smug about it

http://ift.tt/1uItLlO


gotta string (theory) it out a little

http://ift.tt/1w6ZAsS


The Most Successful lawyer...........


A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.


"Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"


The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"


Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um ... no."


The lawyer interrupts, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?"


The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again.


"or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!"


The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..."


On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?"



What does a pregnancy test look like?

http://ift.tt/13nktoH


So this happened last night....what ever happened to teepeeing?

http://ift.tt/1BCA6DV


How do you measure a Lego figure's shoe size?


In square feet.