Its about time too
Thứ Bảy, 1 tháng 8, 2015
I kidnapped this girl last night...
And she yelled "Please, I don't want to die a virgin!". If that isn't consent, I don't know what is.
A lonely widow...
A lonely widow, age 70, decided that it was time to get married again. She put an ad in the local paper that read: HUSBAND WANTED: MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's), MUST NOT BEAT ME, RUN AROUND ON ME, AND MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED! ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON.
On the second day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a grey-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs. The old woman said, "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you? Just look at you...you have no legs!" The old man smiled, "Therefore, I cannot run around on you!" She snorted.
"You don't have any arms either!" Again, the old man smiled, "Therefore, I can never beat you!" She raised an eyebrow and asked intently, "Are you still good in bed???" The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said.... "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"
I caught my girlfriend cheating with my best friend.
She was tired of getting beaten all the time, and he was jealous of all my money and property. I was so upset when I found out, that I flipped the game board over and left them to pick up all the pieces.
A Company Copes With Backlash Against the Raise That Roared
A Company Copes With Backlash Against the Raise That Roared
When Dan Price announced he was setting a minimum salary of $70,000 for his 120 employees, he didn’t foresee the turmoil it would cause for his business.
August 1, 2015 at 04:05AM
via Digg http://ift.tt/1DeGE16
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