Did you know Avatar is a sequel to Titanic?

It picks up where Titanic left off, in the sense that half the cast is blue and dying.

Obligatory edit: Frontpage on /r/jokes! Wohooo!

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Lent joke to tell tomorrow for Easter

Each Friday night after work, Bubba would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a venison steak. But, all of Bubba's neighbors were Catholic.... and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating meat on Friday.

The delicious aroma from the grilled venison steaks was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their priest. The Priest came to visit Bubba, and suggested that he become Catholic. After several classes and much study, Bubba attended Mass.....and as the Priest sprinkled holy water over him, he said,

"You were born a Baptist, and raised a Baptist, but now you are a Catholic."

Bubba's neighbors were greatly relieved, until Friday night arrived and the wonderful aroma of grilled venison filled the neighborhood. The Priest was called immediately by the neighbors, and as he rushed into Bubba's yard, clutching a rosary and prepared to scold him, he stopped and watched in amazement. There stood Bubba, clutching a small bottle of holy water which he carefully sprinkled over the grilling meat as he chanted:

"You wuz born a deer, you wuz raised a deer, but now you is a catfish."

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What is the best armor for sneaking?

Leather, it's made of hide.

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What's the difference between a hooker and jesus?

The look on their face when you're nailing them.

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What does a cop and a dj have in common

They both tell drunk people to put their hands up

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I went by the house I grew up in and asked if I could go in and look around. They said no and slammed the door.

My parents can be so rude...

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What do you call a person with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows.

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