A joke is like a frog..

When you dissect it, it dies. Get it? Just like a frog dies when you dissect it, so does a joke when you explain it. Basically, the frog is used as an analogy, to help people understand that jokes shouldn't be explained, because the joke will die, or more specifically, become unfunny. So, just like when a frog dies when you dissect it, so does a joke when you dissect, or explain it....

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Two Italian men get on a bus...

They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following: "Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time." "You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!" "Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a...

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Can't serve drink to the drunk...

A man, clearly the worse for drink, staggers into a bar and orders a pint. The barman says to him "I'm afraid I can't serve you, as you are obviously drunk. Would you like me to call you a taxi?" Mumbling something or other along the lines of "no", the man clumsily makes his way back out the door without causing any fuss. A few minutes later, the man comes back in through the side door of the pub, and tries to order a pint. "I'm afraid, sir, that I still cannot serve you as you are drunk," comes the reply, "are you sure you don't want me to call...

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Why can't dyslexics tell jokes?

They always punch up the fuckline....

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Did you hear about the cowboy who wore a hat made of paper towels?

He had a bounty on his head. ...I'll see myself out. :-/...

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Snake walks into a bar.

And the bartender says ''How did you do that?''...

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I told my friend that Jewish people call God by a different name.

He said, "No way!", to which I replied, "Yahweh"....

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