It's just that men are better at it like everything else.
Thứ Sáu, 1 tháng 7, 2016
Irish Viagra
An Irish woman of advanced age visited her physician to ask his help in reviving her husband's libido.
'What about trying Viagra?' asks the doctor.
'Not a chance", she said. "He won't even take an aspirin".
'Not a problem", replied the doctor. "Give him an 'Irish Viagra'. It's when you drop the Viagra tablet into his coffee. He won't even taste it. Give it a try and call me in a week to let me know how things went."
It wasn't a week later that she called the doctor, who directly inquired as to progress.
The poor dear exclaimed, "Oh, faith, bejaysus and begorrah! T'was horrid! Just terrible, doctor!"
"Really? What happened?" asked the doctor.
'Well, I did as you advised and slipped it into his coffee and the effect was almost immediate. He jumped straight up, with a twinkle in his eye, and with his pants a-bulging fiercely! With one swoop of his arm, he sent the cups and napkins flying, ripped me clothes to tatters and took me then and there, took me passionately on the tabletop! It was a nightmare, I tell you, an absolute nightmare!"
Why so terrible?" asked the doctor, "Do you mean the sex your husband provided wasn't good"?
'Twas the best sex I've had in 25 years! But as sure as I'm sittin' here, I'll never be able to show me face in Starbucks again!"
Marriage Counseling
Therapist: So you're considering ending the marriage?
Wife: I am sick of all the Star Wars puns.
Husband: Divorce is strong with this one.
Osama Bin Laden appeared in a video recently claiming to be alive
Among other things, he also commented on how shitty the English football team had become.
British Intelligence, however, have dismissed it saying that it could have been recorded anytime during the last 44 years.
New CEO
The board of directors at one company decided to hire new executive staff in order to increase the company's profits. The new CEO was a very tough guy who made it his mission to rid the company of slackers. One time he notices a guy in the hallway leaning against the wall picking his nose. As there were other employees in the hallway, he decides to make a public firing. He walks up to the guy and asks,
"How much do you make in a week?"
"$400" says the guy, stunned by such a question.
The CEO then goes into his office and a few minutes later comes out with a large stack of bills. He hands $1600 to the guy and says,
"Here's your pay for four weeks. You're fired. Now get the fuck out of here and never come back"
The CEO, clearly pleased what he had just done turns to the witnessing employees and asks,
"Does anybody know what the hell this slacker was doing?"
One of the employees says,
"He was a pizza delivery guy waiting for someone to pay for the pizza he'd just delivered."
30 years ago
A husband are his wife are lying in bed, reminiscing about their love life.
The woman asks: "What did you think of my body the day you first saw me naked, 30 years ago?"
"I wanted to fuck your brains out and suck your tits dry"
"And what do you think of my body now?" Uttered the woman as she removed her robe.
"I think i did a pretty good job"
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