One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
Thứ Ba, 19 tháng 7, 2016
A man died and...
A man died and went up to the Pearly Gates to stand before Saint Peter. Peter told him, “Before you meet with God, I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad. We’re not really sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?”
The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, “Well, yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a man who was being harassed by a group of thugs. So I pulled over, got my baseball bat out from behind my seat, and went up to the leader of the thugs. He was a big, muscular guy with a ring pierced through his lip. Well, I tore the ring out of his lip, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering this guy or they would have to deal with me!”
“Wow that’s impressive, When did this happen?” asked Peter.
“About three minutes ago.”
(Apologies if this is a re-post.)
Trump’s Boswell Speaks
Trump’s Boswell Speaks
“The Art of the Deal” made America see Trump as a charmer with an unfailing knack for business. Tony Schwartz helped create that myth — and regrets it.
July 18, 2016 at 09:28PM
via Digg http://ift.tt/29GLs5Z
I went up to a sexy girl in a bar.
I said, "Would you like to come back to my place?"
"I think you should ask my boyfriend first." she smiled.
I said, "No thanks. I'm not gay."
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