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Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.

Thứ Hai, 1 tháng 8, 2016

A couple of women were playing golf one sunny Saturday morning...

The first of the twosome teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a pair of men playing the next hole.

Indeed, the ball hit one of the men, and he immediately clasped his hands together at his crotch, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in evident agony.

The woman rushed down to the man and immediately began to apologize.

"Please allow me to help," she said. "I'm a physical therapist and I know I could relieve your pain if you'd allow."

"Er --", the man started to say.

"No, I insist," she replied.

"But --"

"I insist," she repeated, and despite his objections, she gently moved his hands to the side and loosened his pants.

Then she put her hands inside and began to massage him.

After a moment she asked him, "How does that feel?"

To which he replied, "Well, it feels great, but my thumb still hurts like hell."

My friend asked me to describe myself in 3 words...

Lazy

I accidentally clicked on a "You've won an iPhone"-popup.

Luckliy it was only a virus.

People use to laugh at me when I would say "I want to be a comedian"

Well nobody is laughing now.

Three priests walk into a bar

and see a man whos already had a few drinks. The man walks up to them and says "you know I'm jesus christ". One of the priests replies "I don't think you are son" so the man says right, I'll prove it to you. He walks out of the bar and a few seconds later comes stumbling back in. The barman sees him and shout "jesus christ not you again"

What does Tumblr and KFC's chicken have in common?

They both contain high amounts of trans fats.

A pregnant woman hobbles into the hospital with one hand on her back...

A nurse asks her what's wrong, and the pregnant woman screams, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Didn't!"

The nurse shakes her head and says, "I'm sorry…I don't understand."

The pregnant woman's face contorts in pain as she shouts, "Can't! Won't! Don't!"

The nurse, bewildered, turns to a doctor.

"Admit her," the doctor said. "She's having contractions."