She must have misunderstood because now we have twin daughters from the mailman
Thứ Năm, 18 tháng 8, 2016
A man with a gun walks in to a bar...
He unholsters the weapon and waves it in the air, shouting, "I have a 45 caliber Colt 1911 with 7 rounds in the magazine and one in the chamber, and I want to know who's been sleeping with my wife!"
A voice from the back shouts, "you're gonna need more ammo!"
About 4,000 years ago:
God: I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!
Fish: Winks at God and slips him a $20 note
God: Correction, I shall create a great flood!
you have a very nice house
A man goes to doctor complaining about migraines.
His doctor tells him, "I also suffer from the same ailment. Every time I get one, I give my dear wife oral sex. When she has an orgasm, she tightens her legs around my head which gets rid of the pain. You should also try it."
Two weeks later, the patient tells doctor, "Your suggestion worked and I'd like to tell you that you have a very nice house."
Thứ Tư, 17 tháng 8, 2016
A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners.
At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.
He took out a business card, wrote 'Revelation 3:20' on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, 'Genesis 3:10..'
Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter.
Revelation 3:20 begins 'Behold, I stand at the door and knock.'
Genesis 3:10 reads, 'I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked.'
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