I saw this huge rock. I told him, "Wow! That's a really big rock!" "Boulder." He says "WOW!!!! THATS A REALLY MASSIVE ROCK" I say while puffing my chest out.
Chủ Nhật, 4 tháng 9, 2016
A bear walks into a bar.
He says to the bartender "I'll have a gin...and tonic."
Bartender says "OK, but why the pause?"
"I was born with them."
One finn is better than ten Russians! (War joke)
A large group of Russian soldiers in the border area in 1939 are moving down a road when they hear a voice call from behind a small hill: "One Finnish soldier is better than ten Russian".
The Russian commander quickly orders 10 of his best men over the hill where Upon a gun-battle breaks out and continues for a few minutes, then silence. The voice once again calls out: "One Finn is better than one hundred Russian."
Furious, the Russian commander sends his next best 100 troops over the hill and instantly a huge gun fight commences. After 10 minutes of battle, again Silence. The calm Finnish voice calls out again: "One Finn is better than one thousand Russians!"
The enraged Russian commander musters 1000 fighters and sends them to the other side of the hill. Rifle fire, machine guns, grenades, rockets and cannon fire ring out as a terrible battle is fought...
Then silence.
Eventually one badly wounded Russian fighter crawls back over the hill and with his dying words tells his commander, "Don't send any more men...it's a trap. There's two of them."
Dave drowned
So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. It's what he would have wanted.
(Gary Delaney)
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