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Thứ Hai, 5 tháng 9, 2016

Osama Bin Laden's son comes home from school crying...

He asks him: "What's wrong son, what happened?"

"The teacher asked the class what the tallest building in New York is, and I got the answer wrong."

"Why, what did you answer?"

"The Empire State Building."

"Don't worry son, daddy will take care of it."

Is Elon Musk trying to do too much too fast?


Is Elon Musk trying to do too much too fast?
If you deal in cars and rockets, you’re going to have crashes and blasts. But how many crashes and blasts before your business takes a fatal hit?

September 4, 2016 at 11:54PM
via Digg http://ift.tt/2c9p1qH

TIL that "Call of Duty" has a different name in the Middle-East

They call it "The Sims"

I saw two blind men fighting

And I yelled out "I'm rooting for the one with the knife"

Then they both ran away

A homeless mans funeral.

As a bagpiper, I play many places. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper's cemetery in the Kentucky back country.

As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost and, being a typical man, I didn't stop for directions.

I finally arrived an hour late and saw the funeral guy had evidently gone and the hearse was nowhere in sight. There were only the diggers and crew left and they were eating lunch.

I felt bad and apologized to the men for being late. I went to the side of the grave and looked down and the vault lid was already in place. I didn't know what else to do, so I started to play.

The workers put down their lunches and began to gather around. I played out my heart and soul for this man with no family and friends. I played like I've never played before for this homeless man.

And as I played 'Amazing Grace,' the workers began to weep. They wept, I wept, we all wept together. When I finished I packed up my bagpipes and started for my car. Though my head hung low, my heart was full.

As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, "I never seen nothin' like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years."

Apparently I'm still lost....

I don't know why, but the record for oldest person seems to be cursed.

Every time someone gets it, they die shortly afterwards.

If Trump is elected president...

He will be the first billionaire to move into government housing after a black man.