The only club named after two things that ISIS hate.
Thứ Sáu, 28 tháng 10, 2016
A 90-year-old golfer tells his wife that he is quitting the game.
"But why?" asks his wife. "Well, it's my eyesight. I can't see where the ball goes after I hit it". The wife says, "Listen, you can go with my brother Pete. He might be 103 years old but his eyesight is perfect." He agrees and finds himself on the golf course with his brother-in-law. He takes aim and hits a powerful shot that speeds off like a jet. He looks at his brother-in-law and says: "Did you see that Pete?” His brother-in-law says, "Yes, I saw that perfectly.” The golfer says, "Well, where is it then?" Pete responds, "I don't remember."
A man with drugs was caught by the cops in the bathroom
The man says, "I swear, it's not mine! I found it here and tried to flush it down the toilet, but every time I flush the drugs down it magically reappears in my hand!"
"I don't believe you," says the cop. "Show me."
The man tosses the bag of drugs into the toilet, then flushes it. The bag swishes down. The cop then stares at the man's empty hand as the bag is flushed down.
"Well," says the cop, "where are the drugs now?"
"What drugs?"
On Friday, an elementary school teacher poses her students a challenge....
"If you can tell me who said the following quote, they don't have to come to school on Monday: 'We have nothing to fear, but fear itself'"
A hand shoots up and little Billy Tran says "Franklin Delano Roosevelt".
"Correct, Billy. You can have next Monday off" the teacher replies.
"I'm Vietnamese, we value education I'll be here Monday".
"Ok" says the teacher "Lets try another one: 'Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.'"
This time the hand of little Susie Hou rises.
"Abraham Lincoln"
"Correct Susie." the teacher asserts "Enjoy your day off"
Susie says "Oh no ma'am. I'm Chinese, we also value education I'll be here early on Monday morning".
"Fucking immigrants!" a voice says from the back.
"Who said that?!" the teacher snaps.
"Donald Trump..." says little Johnny "...I'll see ya Tuesday"
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