A little girl cuts her hand on the playground and runs crying to the teacher.

She asks the teacher for a glass of cider.

"Why do you want a glass of cider?" the teacher asks.

"To take away the pain," sobs the little girl.

"What do you mean?" the teacher asks.

"Well," sobs the little girl. "I overheard my big sister say that whenever she has a prick in her hand, she can't wait to get it in cider."

Read More

Inside the Chinese Factory Making Ivanka Trumps Shoes

Inside the Chinese Factory Making Ivanka Trumps Shoes
While Donald Trump rails against outsourcing jobs to China, his daughter does just that with her shoe line. Tour the factory where her footwear is made.

December 9, 2016 at 11:28PM
via Digg http://ift.tt/2hnkP9D

Read More

What does the Secret Service say when Donald Trump gets shot at?

"Donald! Duck!"

Read More

What's the difference between a crow and a raven?

All birds have tail feathers that help them fly called pinions. Crows have 3 pinions and ravens have 4. The difference is just a matter of a pinion.

Read More

A feminist once asked me, "What's your view on lesbians?"

I said "1080p"

Read More

As a doctor, I've never made a joke about an unvaccinated baby before

but let me give it a shot.

Read More

I saw my mother-in-law tying herself to the train tracks. I couldn't believe what I was witnessing.

I looked at her, my eyes widened, and said, "Don't do it!"

"Why the hell not?!" she yelled.

I said, "They aren't running today."

Read More