FunnyStory about animals and all around the world
Funny Video about animals and all around the world! :)
Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)
Play game and comfortable :)
Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.
An atheist is out on the Atlantic ocean deep sea fishing when his boat is attacked by the Kraken. Huge tentacles wrap around the boat and begin to rip it in two. He looks over the boat straight into the jaws of the beast and screams "Oh God! Help!"
Time freezes. A ray of light shines down on him and he hears a deep voice say "I thought you didn't believe I was real."
"Come on, God, cut me a break!" the man responds. "A few seconds ago, I didn't believe the Kraken was real either!"
Upon arriving he notices a particularly popular homosexual bar specifically for women. Seeing a potentially valuable investment, he enters and speaks to the owner.
"How much to own this place?" He asks.
The owner responds: "not for sale, I've got customers waiting."
The millionaire, not wanting to miss an investment, grabs the owners arm as he turns to go and says "wait, I'll do anything to own this place!"
The owner turns back to him slowly and says... "What would you do for a Klon Dyke-bar?"
At a meeting in a synagogue, a young Jew asked the wise old Rabbi: "Rabbi, why do people hate us so much?" The Rabbi thinks for a while and says "That is an interesting question. We will all talk about it tomorrow over some vodka! Each one of you shall bring a bottle of fine vodka, so we can mix it all up in a big pot and drink, discuss, and then the answer will be clear."
The young Jew went home and thought to himself "if everyone else is going to bring a bottle of vodka, I'll just bring a bottle of water and no one will be the wiser." Next day the young Jew showed up with a vodka bottle filled with water, anxious to see what answer the Rabbi would provide to his question. The Rabbi started to pour all the vodka together in one pot and began stirring it. The young Jew got impatient - "Please, Rabbi! What is the answer to my question? Why do people hate us so much?" The Rabbi then filled a cup, gave it to the young Jew and said "Drink this now!" The young Jew drank the cup and said "But this is just water!" And the Rabbi said "and that is why the people hate us"
Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to visit her 95 year-old grandmother and comfort her. when she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning." Horrified, Kate told her grandmother that 2 people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble. "Oh, no my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realising our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong." She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "He'd still be alive if the Ice Cream truck hadn't come along."
His mother awkwardly answers, "The stork brought you."
"Oh," says the boy. "Well, how were you and Daddy born?"
"Um, well, the stork brought us, too, and Grandpa and Grandma."
The boy begins his paper, "This report has been very difficult to write due to the fact that there hasn't been a natural childbirth in my family for three generations."
Once upon a time ..a small boy named Basheer lived in a tiny Moroccan village. All his classmates hated him for his stupidity especially his teacher who was always yelling at him "you are driving me crazy Basheer"...
One day his mother went to check out how he is doing at school and the teacher told her honestly that her son is simply a disaster, getting very low marks and never had she seen such a dumb boy in her whole career...
The mother could not accept such a feed back and she took her son out from that school. she even shifted to another city ...
25 years later, that teacher got a cardio disorder and all the doctors have advised her to go for an open heart operation which only one surgeon could perform..
Left with no other choice she did it and the surgery was successful ...when she opened her eyes, she saw a handsome doctor smiling to her, being under anesthesia effect, she wanted to thank him but could not talk, in turn, he was staring at her face which started turning blue, she was raising her hand trying to tell him some thing but in vain and eventually died...
The doctor was shocked and was trying to understand what just happened, till he turned back and saw our friend Basheer working as a cleaner in that hospital who unplugged the ventilator to connect his vacuum cleaner......
If you were thinking that Basheer became a doctor, its because you have been reading too many motivational forward messages