George Bush, Barack Obama and Donald Trump are going for a job interview with God.

God asks Bush: “What do you believe in?”

Bush replies: “I believe in a free economy, a strong America, the American nation and so on ...”

God is impressed by Bush and tells him: “Great, come sit on the chair on my right.”

God goes to Obama and asks: “What do you believe in?”

Obama replies: “I believe in democracy, helping the poor, world peace, etc. ...”

God is really impressed by Obama and tells him: “Well done, come sit on the chair on my left.”

Finally, God asks Trump: “What do you believe in”?

Trump replies: “I believe you're sitting on my chair.”

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A man walks into a bar

A man walks into a bar and orders 10 shots of whiskey. The bartender pours them and the man immediately downs them one after another. The bartender says " are you ok, I've never seen anyone drink like that." The man replied "if you had what I have you would drink like that too." The bartender asks "that's rough, what do you have?"

The man replies "about $.50".

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If someone tries to shoot the President...

The Secret Service will have to yell "Donald duck!"

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Genie: What is your first wish?

joe: i want to be rich.

genie: granted. what is your second wish?

rich: i want lots of money.

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Rogue Scientists Race to Save Climate Data from Trump

Rogue Scientists Race to Save Climate Data from Trump
As Trump threatens to defund and dismantle parts of the EPA and NOAA to hide the impact of climate change, a group of researchers are making an effort to save the data.

January 20, 2017 at 08:52PM
via Digg http://ift.tt/2jGOvz8

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A physicist, engineer, and mathematician are asked by a local farmer to build the smallest fence they possibly can to hold in all of his sheep.

The physicist builds a big fence and slowly reduces the size until he can't reduce the fence any longer.

The engineer measures each sheep, stacks them in a specific way, and then builds a fence around them.

The mathematician builds a small fence around himself, then defines himself to be outside the fence.

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Everyone is talking about how the inaugural attendance was 1/40 of what it was in 2009...

They don't understand how killer the commute from Moscow is.

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