He said that I needed to stop masturbating.
I asked "Why? I'm a normal 22 year old man, it shouldn't be an issue".
He said "Yeah but I'm trying to examine you"....
Thứ Ba, 21 tháng 3, 2017
A lawyer gets pulled over by a police officer.
The officer asks the lawyer "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
"I haven't the foggiest idea," said the lawyer.
The officer replied, "You didn't make a full stop at the stop sign back there. You only slowed down."
The lawyer thinks for a few seconds then says, "If you can prove to me the difference between stopping and slowing down, I'll take full responsibility. Otherwise, you let me off with a warning. Sound fair?"
The officer ponders it shortly before nodding his head. "Sounds fair. Can you step out of the car please?"
Just as the lawyer steps...
The pessimist sees a dark tunnel...
The optimist sees a light at the end of the tunnel
The realist sees two lights at the end of the tunnel
... and the engineer can see three idiots standing on the rails....
I took a girl home from the club last night
as we got inside the house i said, "You'll be walking funny tomorrow."
"ooooooh" she smiled, "Have a big cock do we"
I locked the door and said, "No, i'm going to cut off your feet."...
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