Boob itch

A boyfriend walks in on his girlfriend scratching her breast. Delighted that he caught a glimpse of such a rare occurrence, he cries, "Boob itch!"

His girlfriend turns to him, slaps him in the face, and says, "Don't call me that! And you didn't scare me."

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What are porn stars paid?

Income

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I went for a job interview today and the manager said,"We're looking for someone who is responsible"

..."Well Im your man" I replied,"In my last job, whenever anything went wrong they said I was responsible"

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What did the father say when he was killing his kid with a vacuum?

Dyson.

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[NSFW] Whenever I have sex, it's a race to see who comes first

Me or the police.

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If you ever stick your dick inside a peanut butter jar...

You're fucking nuts

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Manliest man ever contest

Three men joined the Manliest Man Ever contest, the one who passed 3 rooms will get the award: - First room: 10 barrels of best wine - Second room: 10 times with a very hot model - Third room: 10 hours with a tiger.

The first guy goes with the girl room, and after 8 times, he quit. The second guy goes with the tiger, and after 8 hours, he quit.

The last guy said "f**k the contest, I will try the wine first", the he goes to the first room. After 10 barrels, he somehow managed to go to the tiger room. 10 hours later, he came out, and said

"Hell of a night man. Now, show me the tiger room"

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