But,
Smoking bacon will cure it.
Thứ Năm, 8 tháng 6, 2017
Jesus sacrificed his life for your sins…
Except he came back…
So, what did he really sacrifice?
His weekend?
Jesus sacrificed his weekend for your sins…
A golfer hits his ball into a yard next to the golf course
A golfer hits his ball into a yard next to the golf course.
As he goes to get it a man in the yard says, "Don't you see the sign? It says, 'Private property - Stay Out!'"
The golfer says, "I'm sorry I did not see it. That is my ball there. May I have it, please?"
The man says, "It's in my yard and so it's my ball now."
The golfer looks at the man and says, "I understand!"
He then walks back to the golf cart, gets another golf ball, then walks back and throws it into the yard.
The man says, "What is that for?"
The golfer replies, "I consider myself a Gentleman, and I believe every Dick should have two balls"
I met Buzz Aldrin once and asked how he felt being the second man on the moon...
"Well" he said, "it could have been anyone. Right up until we landed, we hadn't decided who would be first out the door.
Then, once we touched down, Neil suggested we toss for it."
"And he won?" I said.
"Well, no" he mumbled. "The coin was still in the air when Neil jumped down the ladder. The twat."
A woman is just getting out of the shower when there’s a knock at the front door
She doesn’t have a towel at hand so she shouts, “Who is it?”
“It’s the blind man”
Realising the towel no longer matters, she opens the door.
The blind man says, “Nice tits, love. Where do you want the blinds?”
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