Military Joke

An Army Ranger, a Recon Marine, a Navy SEAL, and a member of Delta Force are sitting around a camp fire. The Army Ranger, bragging about his exploits says "You guys aren't so tough, I once parachuted down, marched fifty miles, and killed everyone in sight." The Recon Marine is unimpressed, and says, "That's nothing, I once made a beach landing, marched 60 miles, and killed everyone in sight." The SEAL is unimpressed, he says "That's nothing, I once swam 10 miles to shore, marched 70 miles, and killed everyone in sight with my bare hands." Thoroughly impressed, they all look over at the Delta Force member, and he's dead silent, just stirring the coals of the fire with his dick.

Read More

Washington's Never Seen Anything Like the Comey Crisis. Or Has It?

Washington's Never Seen Anything Like the Comey Crisis. Or Has It?
Tim Weiner, chronicler of US intel agencies, points out that in showdowns with a president, the FBI is 4-0.

June 11, 2017 at 02:10AM
via Digg http://ift.tt/2sfqNPg

Read More

My little brother wanted to be treated like a prince...

...So I slit his throat while he was sleeping to ensure he didn't lay claim to my crown.

Read More

My wife told me that our can opener is broken.

So I told her it's a can't opener now.

Read More

During WW2, three generals were arguing who had the bravest soldiers.

The British general called one of his men over.

“Private! See that nazi tank in the minefield there? Go destroy it.”

“Yes, Sir!” The soldier replied and started running.

He ran across the unmarked minefield until within range of the tank with his anti-tank weapon, took aim and fired, destroying the tank all the while under heavy fire from the enemy trenches.

“See, British soldiers are the bravest.”

“That’s nothing” said the Russian General

“Comrade! See that enemy soldier manning that machine gun there? Run across the mines into the trenches and kill him with a knife.”

“Da, Comrade General!”

The russian soldier bravely charges across the minefield under heavy fire, jumped into the trenches fought his way through many enemy soldier then being shot many times from the machine gun nest before reaching that soldier and slicing his throat after a bloody brawl.

“Nobody more brave than Russian soldier.”

The American general, unimpressed said “Let me show you all what real courage is.”

He calls one of his men over.

“Private! See that enemy command post over there? I want you to run naked across the minefields, fight your way through the trenches, go to the command post and kill the commanding officer bare handed!”

Without hesitation, the American soldier flips him the bird and says

“Go fuck yourself, General.”

“See! Now that takes some real balls!”

Read More

Some people have 10 teeth, while others have 32

It's simple meth

Read More

Toilet paper is sort of like the Starship Enterprise

it circles Uranus looking for Klingons

Read More