FunnyStory about animals and all around the world
Funny Video about animals and all around the world! :)
Funny picture about animals and all around the world :)
Play game and comfortable :)
Go to Blogger edit html and find these sentences.Now replace these sentences with your own descriptions.
the first thing I want you to get me is a face lift and a boob job," said my 48 year old girlfriend as I was checking my ticket.
"Well, actually, the first thing I would buy is a reconditioned engine and a respray for my Pinto," I replied.
"Why would you waste your money tarting that old thing up, you might as well get yourself a new one," she said.
"My point exactly."
Dad : I just donated all your toys to the orphanage
Son: Why?
Dad: So you'll have something to play with when i take you there.
Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!"
The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later, a Ferrari stops in front of their house. A mature and distinguished man with gray hair and impeccably dressed in an Armani suit steps out of the of the Ferrari and enters the house. He sits in the living room with the father, mother, and the girl and tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. I can't marry her because of my personal family situation but I'll take charge."
"I will pay all costs and provide for your daughter for the rest of her life." "Additionally, if a girl is born, I will bequeath a Ferrari, a beach house, two retail stores, a townhouse, a beachfront villa, and a $2,000,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories and a $4,000,000 bank account. If twins, they will receive a factory and $2,000,000 each. However, if there is a miscarriage, what do you suggest I do?"
At this point, the father, who had remained silent, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him, "You fuck her again."
One evening, after their honeymoon, he was welding some stuff in the garage, just for fun. His new wife was standing there at the bench watching him.
After a long period of silence she finally spoke................. "Honey, I've just been thinking, now that we are married, maybe it's time you quit spending all your time out here in the shop. You probably should just consider selling all your welders along with your gun collection and that stupid vintage Harley.”
John got a horrified look on his face.
She said"Darling, what's wrong?"
He replied, "There, for a minute, you were starting to sound like my ex-wife."
"Ex-wife!" she screamed, "YOU NEVER TOLD ME YOU WERE MARRIED BEFORE!"
Tom replied: “I wasn't."