She asks the pharmacist if he has viagra. "I sure do" he responds. "Does it actually work?". "Of course it does." He responds. "Can you get it over the counter?" She asks.
"I can if I take two".
Thứ Hai, 17 tháng 7, 2017
One day, King Arthur had to leave Camelot to go for a diplomatic hunt. Worried about his wife's potential infidelity, he asks Merlin to fashion her a chastity belt...
Merlin assures the king that anything that is put through the hole in the chastity belt will be immediately cut off with magic.
Satisfied, King Arthur goes on his hunt. When he returns several days later, he immediately goes to the Knights of the Round Table and asks all of them to drop their pants.
Incredibly, all of their dicks are cut off, except Sir Lancelot. King Arthur, furious, yells at his knights, "See! Look how none of you are trustworthy around my wife. How dare you all to betray me! I shall have you all demoted, except for Sir Lancelot, my dearest, truest friend. Thank you for keeping my trust, good noble sir. Now, what do you have to say for yourself?"
...But Sir Lancelot could not speak.
A friend got mad at me for smelling his sister's underwear.
I don't know if it was because she was still wearing them or because the rest of the family was there. Either way it made the rest of the funeral very awkward.
A military crew in a submarine just won a major battle
A military crew in a submarine just won a major battle, and they rescued a captured civilian from the boat they fought. To celebrate their success, the crew decided to have a small party with whatever food and drinks they had on hand.
The crew set up multiple crates to act as tables, and everyone got in line to get some well-deserved food.
The civilian decided he was going to have some juice, but so did everyone else. He ended up waiting a whole hour just to get his juice from the juice table.
When he finally got to the table, he told the crewman running the table "What the hell? You had me wait a whole hour just for some juice! The party is practically over by now!"
The crewman responded "Sorry, bud. The punchlines are never that great on this sub."
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