To get his master's degree.
Chủ Nhật, 6 tháng 8, 2017
A magician joke
A magician on a cruise ship is starting his routine, in the audience is the captain and his pet parrot.
During his routine, the magician pulls a quarter out of a kids ear. The bird flaps around his cage and says "It was in his hand"
Agitated, but not discouraged, the magician continues. He makes flowers appear from nowhere. Again, the parrot announces "Wire up the sleeve!"
The magician stops and says "Listen here, bird, if you don't stay quiet I'm going to shoot you" the parrot sits quietly
Then towards the end of his act the magician makes his hat disappear. The parrot squawks loudly "It's in his back pocket!" Now furious, the magician pulls a gun out and fires once at the parrot. He misses and it ricochets all the way down to the engine room and blows up the ship. The only survivors are the parrot and the magician.
Three days pass and they say nothing to each other. On the fourth day the parrot looks at the magician and says "Ok, I give up. Where's the ship?"
A guy picks up a beautiful blonde girl and takes her back to his place...
They have wild passionate sex and lay there panting when it's all over. All of a sudden, she sits up all scared.
"Wait! We should have used a condom! You don't have AIDS, do you!?"
The guy says, "No. I'm clean."
"Whew," the blonde girl says. "Good thing. I sure wouldn't want to catch that shit twice!"
This Shadowy Company Is Flying Spy Planes Over US Cities
This Shadowy Company Is Flying Spy Planes Over US Cities
It has tracked cell phones for military training and flown a camera that can watch over a city for hours at a time.
August 6, 2017 at 01:05AM
via Digg http://ift.tt/2hxQ8zJ
I'm bored so here's an original joke.
A man walks by a baseball hat store and turns to look at it. The shop was aptly named "BOB'S BASEBALL HATS."
Wanting to browse, the man decides to enter. The first thing he notices is the very loud music, with the singer seemingly yelling each word. After browsing for some time, a sales representative comes up to him and shouts "HELLO! NEED ANY HELP FINDING WHAT YOU'RE LOOKING FOR!?"
The man is bewildered, and asks "Why are you shouting at me?"
The rep then shouts back "SPEAK LOUDER PLEASE!"
"Why are you shouting at me?!" The man asks, louder this time.
The rep is still not satisfied. "YOU NEED TO SPEAK MUCH LOUDER, SIR!"
Finally, the man shouts back at the same volume as the rep. "WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING AT ME!?"
Now, the sales rep gives him a straight answer. "SIR, THIS STORE ONLY SELLS BASEBALL HATS!"
"WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?!" The man screams.
Everything became clear to the man when the sales rep screamed back. "THIS STORE IS ALL CAPS!"
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