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Chủ Nhật, 13 tháng 8, 2017

Vladamir Putin, Donald Trump, and Kim Jong Un all die and go to hell.

While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for. The devil tells them it's for calling back to Earth. Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes. When he was finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check. Next Donald Trump calls America and talks for 2 hours. When he was finished the devil informs him that his cost is 6 million dollars, so The Don writes him a check. Finally Kim Jong Un gets his turn and he's talking to all his friends, his harem, and all his generals for 20 hours. When he was finished the devil informed him that his cost would be $1. When Trump and Putin hear this they go ballistic and ask the devil why Kim Jong Un got to call North Korea for so cheap. The devil replied, "Well, from hell to hell it's local."

When I was younger I felt like a man trapped inside a woman's body.

Then I was born.

Jim decided to propose to Sandy, but prior to her acceptance

Sandy had to confess to her man about her childhood illness. She informed Jim that she suffered a disease that left her breasts at the growth state of a 12 year old.

He stated that it was OK because he loved her so much.

“I too have a problem. My penis is the same size as an infant and I hope you could deal with that once we are married.”

She said, “Yes I will marry you and learn to live with your infant penis.”

So, Sandy and Jim got married and they could not wait so Jim whisked Sandy off to their hotel suite and they started touch teasing, holding one another. As Sandy put her hands in Jim’s pants, she began to scream and ran out of the room! Jim ran after her to find out what was wrong.

She said, “You told me your penis was the size of an infant!”

“Yes it is: 8 pounds, 7 ounces, 19 inches long!”

A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and asks for a beer

The bartender nods, "and how about one for the road?"

If having a big car means you have a small dick and having big feet means you have a big dick

Then its no wonder people are afraid of clowns

Studies have shown that smoking weed causes short term memory loss.

Next thing you know they'll be saying smoking weed causes short term memory loss.

Car Plows Into Counter-Protesters At White Nationalist Rally, And Other News From Charlottesville


Car Plows Into Counter-Protesters At White Nationalist Rally, And Other News From Charlottesville
This morning, a rally by white nationalists was abandoned after clashes between protestors and counter-protestors prompted the governor of Indiana to declare a state of emergency.

August 13, 2017 at 03:18AM
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