One turns and says to the other, "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks in there."
Thứ Tư, 27 tháng 9, 2017
4 nuns died in a car crash.
St. Peter greets them at the pearly gates and says "The only reason you aren't already inside is that you have sinned and never confessed. This is your amnesty if you have a confession, now's the time." The first nun was very hesitant but finally stepped forward. "I saw a man's penis once and had impure thoughts." St. Peter replied, "That's okay, just wash your eyes out with holy water, and you may enter." The second nun stepped forward. "I touched a man's penis once." "That's okay, Sister," St. Peter replied. "Just wash your hands with holy water, and you may enter." The fourth nun begins to cut in front of the third, and an all-out brawl breaks out between the two. Habits and hair go flying as St. Peter breaks it up. "Sisters, what has gotten into you two?" The fourth nun, brushing herself off, says, "I only wanted to rinse my mouth out before she sticks her ass in that water."
A blind guy rang my door bell...
When I opened the door he told me, "You should really cover your windows up," and handed me a business card.
I met an older woman at a bar last night. She looked pretty good for a 60+ year-old.
In fact, she wasn't too bad at all, and I found myself thinking she probably had a really hot daughter. We drank a couple of beers, and she asked if I'd ever had a Sportsman's Double?
'What's that?' I asked.
'It's a mother and daughter threesome,' she said.
As my mind began to embrace the idea, and I wondered what her daughter might look like, I said, 'No, I haven't.'
We drank a bit more, then she said with a wink, 'tonight's your lucky night.'
We went back to her place. We walked in. She put on the hall light and shouted upstairs, 'Mom, you still awake?'
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