Donald Trump is asked "What's 2 + 2?"

I have to say a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me, and they ask me. They say, 'What's 2+2'? And I tell them, look, we know what 2+2 is. We've had almost eight years of the worst kind of math you can imagine. Oh, my God, I can't believe it. Addition and subtraction of the 1s the 2s and the 3s. It's terrible. It's just terrible. Look, if you want to know what 2+2 is, do you want to know what 2+2 is? I'll tell you. First of all the number 2, by the way, I love the number 2. It's probably my favorite...

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Why does the Norway Navy have bar codes on the side of their ships?

So when they come back to port they can Scandinavian!...

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I'm Still A Virgin

A lawyer married a woman who had divorced eight husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle with me, I'm still a virgin." "What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be, you have been married eight times?" "Well, husband #1 was a Politician, he kept telling me how great it would be. Husband #2 was a Salesman, never tried it but told others how great it is. Husband #3 was an Engineer, he understood the process but wanted a few years to study possible methods of implementing the process. Husband #4 was in Management,...

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Apart from humans, the only animal that enjoys having sex is a dolphin.

I had to shag a LOT of animals to find that out....

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The Stolen Horse

A Desperado rides into town and downs a few drinks at the saloon. When he steps outside again, he finds his horse has been stolen. The Desperado swears, steps back into the bar, and fires a round into the piano. The room goes dead silent. “I’m gonna have one more beer,” the Desperado bellows to the terrified crowd, “and if my horse ain’t back where I left him when I’m done, I’ll do here what I had to do in Houston.” The locals murmur uneasily as the Desperado sips his drink. Lucky for them all, when he steps outside again his horse has been returned....

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[long] European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language...

of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility . As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English ". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy . The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter . There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the...

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Whispering in the library

A man was looking for a place to sit in a crowded university library. He asked a girl: "Do you mind if I sit beside you?" The girl replied, in a loud voice "NO, I DON'T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT WITH YOU!" All the people in the library started staring at the man, who was deeply embarrassed and moved to another table. After a couple of minutes, the girl walked quietly to the man's table and said with a laugh: "I study psychology, and I know what a man is thinking; I bet you felt embarrassed, right? "The man responded in a loud voice: "$500 FOR ONE...

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