Don't even get me started on the reaction from the head nurse.
Thứ Bảy, 7 tháng 10, 2017
Who Wants to be a Millionaire!
Mick, from Dublin, appeared on 'Who Wants To Be A Millionaire' and towards the end of the program had already won 500,000 euros.
"You've done very well so far," said Chris Tarrant, the show's presenter, "but for a million euros you've only got one life-line left, phone a friend. Everything is riding on this question. Will you go for it?"
"Sure," said Mick. "I'll have a go!"
"Which of the following birds does NOT build its own nest?
a) Sparrow b) Thrush c) Magpie d) Cuckoo
"I haven't got a clue." said Mick, ''So I'll use my last lifeline and phone my friend Paddy back home in Dublin..."
Mick called up his mate, told him the circumstances and repeated the question to him.
"Fookin hell, Mick!" cried Paddy, "Dat's simple it's a cuckoo."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm fookin sure."
Mick hung up the phone and told Chris, "I'll go with cuckoo as my answer."
"Is that your final answer?" asked Chris.
"Dat it is."
There was a long, long pause and then the presenter screamed, "Cuckoo is the correct answer! Mick, you've won one million euros!"
The next night, Mick invited Paddy to their local pub to buy him a drink.
"Tell me, Paddy? How in Heaven's name did you know it was da Cuckoo that doesn't build its own nest?"
“Because he lives in a fookin clock!"
Religion is like a penis.
It's fine to have one, and it's fine to be proud of it.
But, don't go waving it around in people's faces, and for goodness' sake, don't go shoving it down our kids throats.
A married Irishman went into the confessional and said to his priest "I almost had an affair with another woman".
The priest said "What do you mean, almost?"
The Irishman said "Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped. The priest said. "Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box".
The Irishman left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box. He paused for a moment and then started to leave.
The priest, who was watching quickly ran over to him saying "I saw that, you didn't put any money in the poor box!"
The Irishman replied "Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box and according to you that's the same as putting it in!"
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