Dad says to son: "Okay, time to talk about sex"

Son: "Dad, I'm 27, what do you want to talk about?"

Dad: "Show me how to watch porn on a phone"

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I only had one goal in life: to become a better dad than my dad was.

My dad beat me

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I know a communism joke

But it's only funny if EVERYONE gets it.

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A man tells his wife before he goes to bed, "I'm gonna go get your aspirin"

The wife says, "Aspirin? I don't have a headache." "Ah, HAH!!" The man exclaimed

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I don't normally see eye to eye with most Trump supporters, but if there's one thing we do agree on...

It's that the president of Puerto Rico is the dumbest son of a bitch to ever hold public office.

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What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year.

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"If women ruled the world," said my wife, "there'd be no wars."

"That's true," I replied. "Wars require strategy and logic."

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